Very Slowly

Boss on phone: Excuse me? I’m sorry, I don’t speak stupid, let me get one of my employees to speak to you.

Coppell, Texas

Overheard by: Luckily, it wasn’t me.

Posted on June 5, 2008
Default, Insults, Language barrier, Offers and requests, On the phone, Smart Bosses, Texas

It’s a Federal Requirement

Financial advisor on phone with possible client: I gave you what you needed. You have the paperwork. You see my partners’ names. Just don’t bullshit me… Stop cursing! I didn’t curse. I said bullshit, that’s not a curse.

50th and Broadway
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Stuck in this Cube

Posted on June 4, 2008
Compare and contrast, Default, Financial Folk, New York, Offers and requests, On the phone, Service, Words

As a Good-Faith Offering, I’ll Send You Some Toenail Clippings

Cubicle dweller on phone: If you are right, I will cut off my own foot and mail it to you.

Ravenswood Avenue
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Nikki

Posted on June 2, 2008
Body Parts, Cubicles, Default, Illinois, On the phone, Violence, Weirdness

…Dad

Female co-worker on the phone: When is your wife going out of town? We need to get together.

Little Rock, Arkansas

Overheard by: D

Posted on May 28, 2008
Arkansas, Coworkers, Default, On the phone, Questions, Relationships, Sexuality, Wishes

The Riddle Of the Sphincter Redux

Cube mate on phone: Hey! What’s up butt-lord?
[silence] No kidding! You’re such an American asshole. Later!

3rd Avenue
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: radioman

Posted on May 26, 2008
Cubicles, Default, Employees, Insults, On the phone, Washington, Weirdness, Words

Doesn’t Seem to Matter Whose

Big boss to bigger boss, while on phone with car seller: How much are your car payments?
Bigger boss: An arm, a leg, and a testicle!

Worcester Road
Natick, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Meg

Posted on May 26, 2008
Body Parts, Bosses, Coworkers, Default, Gripes, Massachusetts, Money, On the phone, Questions

That Was Less Fun Than I’d Hoped

Worker on phone: Say catastrophe.
Worker on loudspeaker: Castastrosy.
Worker on phone: Yeah, now say catastrophic.
Worker on loudspeaker: Castrastrosic.
Worker on phone: See?
Worker on loudspeaker: See what?

Hemel Hempstead
Hertfordshire
England

Overheard by: Yes i see, this is defintitely catastrophic