Offers and requests

Coworker #1: Could you let me out of the office?
Coworker #2: You didn't bring your entrance card?
Coworker #1: No, and I'm not sure how I got in.

Stockholm
Sweden

Overheard by: Johan

Customer: Do you sell anything that will take the finish off a tile?
Salesman #1: Yeah, I think we have something. Where's that Finnish stripper?
Salesman #2: Out back, next to the Swedish stripper.

Waltham, Massachusetts

Team assistant to IT guy: I can't get this file e-mailed cuz it's too big. Can you come up and zip it or something?
IT guy: Why don't you send it to me? I'll see what I can do.

The Hague
Netherlands

Overheard by: Out of Office

Coworker #1 to husband who dropped off lunch: What is on your shirt?
Husband: I spilled Coke.
Coworker #1: Do you want me to suck it?

St. George, Utah

Overheard by: Charlie

Boss: Don, I'm going to the restroom. Gonna grab some coffee and we'll just do it, okay?

Seattle, Washington

IT guy #1: Can you change those stupid default setting sounds?
IT guy #2: Those aren't default sounds. I spent time picking those out. I really like the submarine sounds!

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Julie

Boss on phone: What do you mean she's canceling the meeting? (pause) Delayed? Why? (pause) She has breast cancer? That's great! (pause) Oh no! I must have cut out, I said “that's a great tragedy.” (pause) Well, that must be awful. (pause) I see, well, send her my best. (pause) Thank you, bye now. (to entire office) Cancer just saved my ass! Who wants to go for drinks?

Chinatown
Manhattan, New York

Female account manager to male account manager who just walked into her office: Okay! Stretch out your rod!

London
Canadia

Jen Warned Me About You.

Proprietor to employee: Can I grab you a minute?

Oakland, New Jersey

Employee: Tom*, do you want to go to lunch?
Tom*: No! I want to kill someone!

Dublin
Ireland