VP: You’ll need to sit between [Jake] and I at the next meeting so I don’t kick his ass.
Peon: I’ll hold him if you’ll hit him.
1500 Hampton Street
Columbia, South Carolina
VP: You’ll need to sit between [Jake] and I at the next meeting so I don’t kick his ass.
Peon: I’ll hold him if you’ll hit him.
1500 Hampton Street
Columbia, South Carolina
Facilitator: Would you like me to advance to the next slide?
Presenter: No, thank you. I’ll catch up in a moment. I just thought myself into a corner.
200 Seaport Boulevard
Boston, Massachusetts
Co-worker: One of the people I was meeting with was Ray Charles…the white, Jewish Ray Charles.
550 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Leader of meeting to team members: Alright, team, let's keep working to get out of this backlog. The backlog is our baby and we need to get rid of it!
Raleigh, North Carolina
Cube rat #1: The Republicans are coming to town in 2012! Isn't that exciting?
Cube rat #2: Exciting?
Cube rat #1: I mean, for the economy.
Cube rat #2: Yeah, the strip clubs and hookers will won't know what hit them.
Government Office
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Sandy Paws
Admin, about boss: He's in a meeting, but she'll nail him when he gets out.
Denver, Colorado
Boss, during sales meeting: I'm still trying to hire a new salesperson. Actually, Mark* was the best candidate, based on Monica's* recommendation, but he couldn't accept the job. And that happens. So, Monica*, you don't need to feel guilty about wasting anyone's time. Although I don't think you do feel guilty, which is really weird because you're Jewish.
Charlotte, North Carolina
Workaholic, exiting a meeting: It's less about zombies than you'd think.
St. Louis, Missouri
Boss on phone: What do you mean she's canceling the meeting? (pause) Delayed? Why? (pause) She has breast cancer? That's great! (pause) Oh no! I must have cut out, I said “that's a great tragedy.” (pause) Well, that must be awful. (pause) I see, well, send her my best. (pause) Thank you, bye now. (to entire office) Cancer just saved my ass! Who wants to go for drinks?
Chinatown
Manhattan, New York
Manager to HR rep entering conference with bigwigs: What are you doing here?
HR rep: You just told me to walk down here with you.
Manager: Oh, well. (continues talking, HR rep walks away)
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by:
