A Number Two?

Boss: And I would bet my… um… pencil, on that. Wait… what do they say?
Grad student: Ass. You'd bet your ass on that.
Boss: Oh, no. I don't want to bet that. I'll bet my favorite pencil.

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

Posted on January 13, 2015
Body Parts, Bosses and Underlings, Maryland, Students, Weirdness, Words

Last Time I Tried That, My Cubicle Looked Like a Crime Scene

Shipping manager: What's wrong with you, little bit? I ain't seen you smile all day.
Short order entry lady: I got my period, so I'm in a bad mood.
Shipping manager: Well, you need to shake it off! Shake the devil off ya!

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Doesn't have the Devil in her

Posted on January 13, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, Feelings, Health & Hygiene, Maryland, Questions, Religion

Male Bonding Is a Serious Undertaking

Italian service guy: Maybe we can bring-a some nice-a cheese, some nice-a mozzarella…
Italian VP: This is a fishing trip! Bah, you've never been on a fishing trip. This isn't gonna be fun.

Rosedale, Maryland

Overheard by: Tempin' it up

Posted on January 1, 2015
Bosses, Employees, Holidays, Maryland, Meals and Snacks, Sexuality, Travel

12PM Work on Budgets

Project Manager: I can’t get my numbers to balance with yours.
Budget Analyst: How much are you off by?
Project Manager: About a million.

5000 Ellin Road
Lanham, Maryland

Overheard by: Cantabile

Posted on December 31, 2014
Dumb Bosses, General Idiocy, Maryland, Questions, Suits

Complaining Is Her Cardio.

Office girl #1: I wish Chinese places would deliver around here!
Office girl #2: They do. You have to pay a service fee but they will bring you food.
Office girl #1: But I don't live around here, so how does that help me?

Maryland

Posted on December 31, 2014
Employees, General Idiocy, Maryland, Money, Questions, Wishes

It’s Quite Possible That Women Have Dirtier Minds Than Men

Female coworker: Why do you shake your mustard like that?
Male coworker: To mix it up real good so I don’t get the pre-mustard on my sandwich.
Female coworker: I am never eating lunch with you again.

West Lexington Street
Baltimore, Maryland

Posted on December 30, 2014
Coworkers, Maryland, Meals and Snacks

Fine, but Why'd We Have to Strip?

Technician, while taking group picture: Okay, everyone gather together and pretend that you're happy!
Advisor: What?!
Technician: Um… Picture time! Yay!

Johns Hopkins University
Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat