In Reality It’s Less Fun Than It Sounds

Project manager, looking at chart of Harvey Balls: You have to play with your balls.

Hotel Room
Bethesda, Maryland

Posted on February 25, 2015
Advice, Body Parts, Default, Employees, Maryland, Sexuality, Weirdness

Seriously, I Thought You Were Turning Into a Rhino or Something

Coworker: I just heard you're seven months pregnant! Wow, and here I thought you were just gaining a lot of weight.
Pregnant chick: Thanks? (laughs)
Coworker: Really! I just figured you were gaining weight!
Pregnant chick: Right. Gotcha. Thanks.

Bethesda, Maryland

Posted on February 24, 2015
Coworkers, Diet & Weight, Maryland, Physical Appearance

Sober? Shudder

Girl student to friend: If we can't operate an elevator here, how are we going to operate an elevator in another country?

Loyola University
Maryland

Overheard by: Nikki C.

Posted on February 17, 2015
General Idiocy, Maryland, Students, Technology, Travel

The Kit-Kat Commercial That Never Made It to TV

Guy in stall to man in next stall making straining sounds: Are you okay?
Man on toilet: Yeah. (pauses, with legs stretched out) Just taking a break.

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Should not have asked

Posted on February 13, 2015
Health & Hygiene, Maryland, Questions, Restroom, Strangers

What I Mean Is “I Enjoy Erotic Experiences with Young Dogs”

Tech manager: Okay, I gotta go finish writing this nasty gram to a client.
Account manager: Hurry up! I want puppies. Puppies! Puppies! Puppies! Oops, that sounded bad.

Rockville, Maryland

Overheard by: Cindy

Posted on February 4, 2015
Body Parts, Bosses, Financial Folk, Maryland, Tech People, Weirdness, Wishes

She Stole a Kid from a Gay Couple? That Is Low

Intern: Candace’s* mom is sixty-five! And she’s had seven kids from, like, eight different guys.

1325 East-West Highway
Silver Spring, Maryland

Overheard by: mathwizrd

Posted on January 17, 2015
Family, General Idiocy, Interns & Temps, Maryland, Places, Time Management

A Number Two?

Boss: And I would bet my… um… pencil, on that. Wait… what do they say?
Grad student: Ass. You'd bet your ass on that.
Boss: Oh, no. I don't want to bet that. I'll bet my favorite pencil.

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

Posted on January 13, 2015
Body Parts, Bosses and Underlings, Maryland, Students, Weirdness, Words

Last Time I Tried That, My Cubicle Looked Like a Crime Scene

Shipping manager: What's wrong with you, little bit? I ain't seen you smile all day.
Short order entry lady: I got my period, so I'm in a bad mood.
Shipping manager: Well, you need to shake it off! Shake the devil off ya!

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Doesn't have the Devil in her

Posted on January 13, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, Feelings, Health & Hygiene, Maryland, Questions, Religion

Male Bonding Is a Serious Undertaking

Italian service guy: Maybe we can bring-a some nice-a cheese, some nice-a mozzarella…
Italian VP: This is a fishing trip! Bah, you've never been on a fishing trip. This isn't gonna be fun.

Rosedale, Maryland

Overheard by: Tempin' it up

Posted on January 1, 2015
Bosses, Employees, Holidays, Maryland, Meals and Snacks, Sexuality, Travel