Boss: It’s such a nice day and nothing is happening in here…I think I’m going to leave.
Employee #1: That sounds good. Can I leave, too?
Boss: Sure.
Employee #2: And me?
Boss: If you want. Hey, [Erica]! If the phone rings, then just–
Clerk: Wait, you’re all going to leave me here by myself and you expect me to actually do shit? Fuck you.
101 Braddock Road
Frostburg, Maryland
Overheard by: Ren
Boss: He can work the balls so nicely. In both directions.
Baltimore, Maryland
Employee: I have to come in on Monday for a training. It's my normal day off, so I might take off Tuesday or Friday instead.
Supervisor: We have the supervisor's retreat on Tuesday, so none of us will be here that day. I'd work then.
Hagerstown, Maryland
Professor: Well, then I saw that there were equations involved, so I freaked out.
3400 North Charles Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Cube dweller: What's up, chest hair?
Office dweller with unbuttoned shirt: I don't *have* any chest hair…and I like it that way.
Owings Mills, Maryland
Overheard by: widget
CSR lady: Looks like you two are gonna have to conversate via email from now on.
Intern: Conversate? You mean ‘converse’?
CSR lady: I mean ‘conversate.’ Same damn thing.
8900 Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Nikki
General manager to sales guy: You are such a candy-assed, chicken-shit, pansy son of a gun!
Warehouse manager to sales guy: Dude, I’ve dated girls that are more of a man than you are!
Receptionist to warehouse manager: Yeah, but you’re from Jersey.
Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Nikki
VP: The publishing of the book will take a long time because it requires a hand job.
Bethesda, Maryland
African American Female: So, [Becky], where are you from?
Native African Female: Uganda.
African American Female: Oh, I thought you were from Africa!
7500 Greenway Center Drive
Greenbelt, Maryland
Female office worker: There's a mouse in the trap under my desk! Come move it!
Male office work: Is he dead?
(supervisor walks in with on tail end of conversation)
Supervisor: All deceased records go to George.
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Ear Hustler
