Worker: Lemon cod, please. With pasta and–
Server: Pasta’s an entree. Not a side.
Worker: Oh, I didn’t see it on the entree sign.
Server: That’s because it’s a side.
9000 Wisconsin Avenue
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: Barb
Worker: Lemon cod, please. With pasta and–
Server: Pasta’s an entree. Not a side.
Worker: Oh, I didn’t see it on the entree sign.
Server: That’s because it’s a side.
9000 Wisconsin Avenue
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: Barb
Employee: I got pulled over for speeding last week, but somehow I got out of the ticket. What is the best way to do that, really?
Boss who’s an ex-cop: I once had a guy tell me he had a cucumber shoved up his ass, so I took him to the hospital and found out it was true.
Employee: Did you give him the ticket?
Boss who’s an ex-cop: Hell no.
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: I’ll take the ticket, thanks
Boss: I really want us to go the whole 11 yards on this.
Employees: [Silence.]Boss: Oh, sorry! Twelve. We need to go the whole 12 yards.
3400 North Charles Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Boss: It’s such a nice day and nothing is happening in here…I think I’m going to leave.
Employee #1: That sounds good. Can I leave, too?
Boss: Sure.
Employee #2: And me?
Boss: If you want. Hey, [Erica]! If the phone rings, then just–
Clerk: Wait, you’re all going to leave me here by myself and you expect me to actually do shit? Fuck you.
101 Braddock Road
Frostburg, Maryland
Overheard by: Ren
Boss: He can work the balls so nicely. In both directions.
Baltimore, Maryland
Employee: I have to come in on Monday for a training. It's my normal day off, so I might take off Tuesday or Friday instead.
Supervisor: We have the supervisor's retreat on Tuesday, so none of us will be here that day. I'd work then.
Hagerstown, Maryland
Professor: Well, then I saw that there were equations involved, so I freaked out.
3400 North Charles Street
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Cube dweller: What's up, chest hair?
Office dweller with unbuttoned shirt: I don't *have* any chest hair…and I like it that way.
Owings Mills, Maryland
Overheard by: widget
CSR lady: Looks like you two are gonna have to conversate via email from now on.
Intern: Conversate? You mean ‘converse’?
CSR lady: I mean ‘conversate.’ Same damn thing.
8900 Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Nikki
General manager to sales guy: You are such a candy-assed, chicken-shit, pansy son of a gun!
Warehouse manager to sales guy: Dude, I’ve dated girls that are more of a man than you are!
Receptionist to warehouse manager: Yeah, but you’re from Jersey.
Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Nikki
