Office manager, on decrease of patient numbers: Well, doc, I know you're going down on your patients but… wait, that wasn't the right way to say that.
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Jill
Office manager, on decrease of patient numbers: Well, doc, I know you're going down on your patients but… wait, that wasn't the right way to say that.
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Jill
Professor: Many cultures handle cleanliness in many ways.
Female student: But just because you're OCD about being clean doesn't mean you're not susceptible to getting herpes.
Fullerton, California
Tech: Am I good to go?
Supervisor: Yeah, just make sure next time you return your work truck, it doesn't smell like Bob Marley farted in it.
Millbrae, California
Female boss at IT meeting: What were you doing at lunch that made you so sweaty?
Male developer #1: Just washing my wife's car.
Male developer #2: So, did you have a good time “washing your wife's car?”
(everyone laughs)
Female boss: You can wash my car anytime you want.
Male developer #1: Uh… okay.
Female boss: What?
Fayetteville, Arkansas
Grandmotherly woman #1: Then you sit the chicken down so that the open beer can goes up its ass.
Grandmotherly woman #2: Well, I sure hope it doesn't have hemorrhoids…
Middltown, Connectict
Overheard by: I just lost my appetite
Peon to office: Has anyone seen a magazine and some aloe lotion?
Broadway, Chicago
Employee on phone with customer: Do we have any books about muffins? You mean how to make muffins? We have cookbooks… (pause) No? (pause) I don't think we have books… Just… About muffins.
Long Island, New York
Coworker: If I ate everything that smelled good I would be dead.
Monroe, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Amanda
Attorney #1: Back in college my girlfriend got mono, but I didn't. I attribute it to having an immune system like Vince Neil.
Attorney #2: That guy could fight off the HIV!
County Courthouse
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Lan
Older coworker: People didn't need health care in World War I, they just died. They didn't bother with “sick”.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Glad I'm healthy.
