Office idiot: Dublin and Luxembourg is two different places, right?
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Office idiot: Dublin and Luxembourg is two different places, right?
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Coworker on phone: Fool me once, shame on… you. (pause) Fool me… the second one is where it’s my fault.
Thurston Avenue
Greensboro, North Carolina
Overheard by: Audrey
Female coworker: I don’t know. I was thinking about losing about 50 pounds.
Male coworker: Yeah, I think I could lose about 30 to 40 myself.
Female coworker: You know what I heard? With men, if you lose, like, 35 pounds, you gain an inch.
Male coworker: Uh…
500 North King Street
Wilmington, Delaware
Overheard by: i just wanted a coke
Customer: I'm looking for the bible.
Shop assistant, typing into computer: Who's it by?
Bookshop
England
Sales guy to another: Hey, have you ever tried that green fairy stuff? You know, abstinence?
Atlanta, Georgia
Manager: So why do you want to work in a book store?
Teen: Um…I love reading books.
Manager: What’s the last book you read?
Teen: Uh…Umm…I don’t…[Giggles]…Umm…
Manager: Well, what’s your favorite book?
Teen: Um…
Manager: Okay.
Barnes & Noble, Irving Mall
Irving, Texas
Overheard by: Mongo Man
Female office worker to another: Most of the stuff on my to-do list is stuff I have to do.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Whaaaaat?
Cube dweller #1: Those guys out there in the warehouse are nice and seem to be doing well, but I don’t know that any of them are going to go out of their way to be helpful.
Cube dweller #2: You mean ‘proactive.’
Cube dweller #1: Well, yeah…
Cube dweller #2: Jack* [warehouse guy] used that term with me once — ‘proactive.’
Cube dweller #1: Uh-oh, maybe the drama out there is his fault.
Cube dweller #2: See, I always thought it was something Jessica Simpson used on her face, but he used it in a totally different way.
Cube dweller #1: … There’s no words to answer you right now…
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Suit #1: Hey, how are you? Haven’t seen you in forever! Still married?
Suit #2: Yup, expecting my first.
Suit #1: Really! When?
Suit #2: November 7th. Bitch finally finished her PhD so she could work, and now she’s pregnant!
383 Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Trainer: Now, see, you just click and drag, like this. (he clicks and drags)
Employee: Wait, can you show me that again?
Saratoga Springs, New York
