Gays and lesbians

Large lesbian boss to employee: I'm going to give her a mouthful… Uhm…I mean a…uhm, eyeful, uhm…wait, earful. I'm going to give her an earful.

Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: Trying not to picture it

Awkward bald man, walking into conference room: Does this work for you?
Obviously lesbian woman meeting with him: Whatever you want, this is all about you.
Awkward bald man: Wow! I wish my wife would say that! She never says anything like that.

Richmond, Virginia

Openly gay reception guy to IT girl: Have you lost weight?
IT girl: Hahahaha, no, but I will totally have your babies now that you've said that.

Lincoln, Nebraska

Overheard by: Not that easy

New office drama queen, on phone: Well see, I just found out my cousin has five different baby mamas. I don't feel bad about having two different baby daddies.

Seattle, Washington

Attorney: Why did you bill all of these overtime hours?
Paralegal: Because you're a faggot!

Manhattan, New York

Manager to gay employee: If you were a man, you'd understand.
Gay employee: Uhhhh… (head tilt)


Overheard by: silent bystander, slowly backing away

Male gay CSR to female straight CSR: The underwear I'm wearing right now is so cute I wish I could show it to you!

San Diego, California

Overheard by: Leigh

Gay coworker to female coworker in white dress: You look so “sacrificial virgin” today.
Female coworker: Um… Thank you?
Gay coworker, whispering: What kind of fabric is that?
Female coworker, whispering: Cotton.
Gay coworker: It looks fun.

Charlotte, North Carolina

Loud gay guy: I am out of cream, so I am really going nasty with the powder.

Kansas City, Missouri

Overheard by: Cubicle Panda

Resident office gay guy: I cant wait until I am pregnant.

Los Angeles, California