Random stranger: Is that the ATM from upstairs?
Worker, hauling ATM down hallway: Yep.
Random stranger: So now I can't get money upstairs?
Worker: Oh, no. The money's still there in a pile. Just take what you need.
Bethesda, Maryland
Random stranger: Is that the ATM from upstairs?
Worker, hauling ATM down hallway: Yep.
Random stranger: So now I can't get money upstairs?
Worker: Oh, no. The money's still there in a pile. Just take what you need.
Bethesda, Maryland
New employee: Did you say to never schedule a meeting in the cafeteria or the nursing mothers station?
Experienced employee: Never in the nursing mothers station!
New employee: But the cafeteria doesn't have a phone…
Greenfield, Indiana
20-something woman: Just when I get my desk cleaned up, someone comes and dumps a pile of bras on it.
36th Street and 6th Avenue
New York, New York
Office chick #1: Hey, I like your shoes. Are they new?
Office chick #2: Thanks. I’ve had them for a while. I just haven’t been wearing them.
Office chick #1: They’re kind of low cut.
Office dude: Yeah, I can see a lot of arch. If this was the middle east, I’d totally be raping you right now.
Rancho Cordova, California
Overheard by: Good thing we’re in Cali.
Lady peon: I really want to fuck him, but I can’t. I’m trying to be monogamous in my non-relationship relationship.
Club restroom
Anchorage, Alaska
College secretary: George loved my dip!
College rep: He also likes penis.
Syracuse, New York
Overheard by: it's true
Office peon on phone: … It’s almost like you’re putting the monkey before the horse.
S. Lima Street
Englewood, Colorado
Female peon: Personally, I can handle four inches without a problem. Doesn’t bother me.
1250 Broadway
New York, New York
Office hoochie on cell: You need to call him and find out who is the source of all the knuckleheadedness.
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Employee #1: Ok, I’m taking breakfast orders for the meeting, what do you guys want?
Employee #2: Ummm, I’ll have the western omelette.
Employee #1: Ok.
Employee #2: Oh, wait…are there eggs in that?
Employee #1: Uh, yeah!
Employee #2: Okay then!
Falls Church, Virginia
Overheard by: You’ve got to be kidding
