CSR on phone: Please sir, stop yelling at me. (pause) You do not need to swear at me. (pause) You call me that one more time and I'm going to hang up. (pause) Yeah, I'm still here. (pause, then hangs up) The best part was he told me to die.
Phildelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: headsethottie
African-American CSR to team manager: Sir, this customer says that he wants to speak to someone else. He says he doesn't want to talk with a “nigger.”
Team manager: Ask him how he feels about talking to a gay Asian man.
Round Rock, Texas
CSR on phone: No ma'am… If I was out trying to bang my dick in a bar I wouldn't take the time to call you back.
Atlanta, Georgia
Woman in cubicle on call with overseas agent: Oh, hello… were you in Slumdog Millionaire?
Confused customer service agent: What?
Ottawa
Canadia
Overheard by: poking my eyes out with my pen
CSR on phone: Help desk, this is James*.
[pause]
CSR: I am sorry, this is the PC and phone help desk. Sounds like you need the facilities help desk if a toilet is stopped up.
[pause]
CSR: Okay sir, I understand, but you need facilites, not the help desk.
[long pause]
CSR: Okay, is it a Windows toilet or a Unix toilet?
Customer, now on speakerphone: Well, there are no windows in this bathroom, so I guess it must be a Unix toilet.
CSR: Okay, I will get a Unix toilet specialist there as soon as we can. Which building and bathroom is it?
[pause]
CSR: Thanks.
[CSR hangs up]
CSR back on phone: Hello, facilities? This is James at the PC help desk. Yeah, I have a doozy for you…try not to laugh…
730 International Parkway
Richardson, Texas
Overheard by: El Gee
CSR: Okay, and what’s the address?
Customer: 123* A Street.
CSR: Okay, and which street is that on?
Customer: A Street.
CSR: I understand that you live on a street, sir, but I need to know which one.
1001 Roeder Avenue
Bellingham, Washington
CSR: Oh, you work on computers? You probably know more than I do so this should be an easy call, huh?
25 Brooklyn Avenue
Forsyth, Georgia
CSR to IT guy carrying video camera on tripod: Hey, it's tripod man!
IT guy: What else can I say but thanks!
Insurance Office
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Dadn8tr
Phone Rep: Sir, are you self-employed?…OK. And do you own the prison?
14700 Citicorp Drive
Hagerstown, Maryland
Caller, after lengthy pause: Sorry, I’m just unplugging the computer.
Tech support: That’s ok. I just pretend I’m getting one of those heavy breathing calls.
Memphis, Tennessee
