Our Double Dates Were More Fun Than You Can Imagine

Crazy coworker, nonchalantly: I knew a guy who killed his girlfriend. Stuffed her in the wall…

Government Office
Washington, DC

Posted on February 8, 2016
Coworkers, Crazies, Government, Relationships, Violence, Washington DC, Weirdness

It’s the Tragedy of the Human Condition

Office grunt: Sometimes you get a hole in your bag and you lose your chicken.

10877 Watson Road
St. Louis, Missouri

Posted on February 6, 2016
Crazies, Missouri, Philosophy

Um, Hmmm — Mood Elevators? Second Floor

Sales lady: Hello.
Crazy lady: Don’t you talk to me! You don’t know me! We don’t know each other! You have no right to talk to me!

Rochester, Minnesota

Overheard by: Katie

Posted on January 12, 2016
Crazies, Minnesota, Threats

That, and They Mess Up Your Room While You’re Sleeping

Woman: I wanted to find out the status of the investigation on my stolen bike. It happened three weeks ago, and I haven’t heard back.
Cop: Well, ma’am, we’ve been busy with the orange alert.
Woman: I’m sorry — orange alert?
Cop: Ma’am, we’re in a war.
Woman: A war?!
Cop: The war with Iraq?
Woman: … You mean the fucking Iraqis stole my bike?!

Washington, DC

Posted on December 23, 2015
Cops, Crazies, Crimes, Washington DC

Yep, PDA’s Are Definitely What’s Going to Precipitate the Second Coming

Older black lady, at a young couple kissing and groping in a line of people waiting to pay their power bills: What the hell is wrong with these peoples? Jesus needs to come down and knock some damn sense into their stupid motherfucking ass.

Nevada Power Company
Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Annmarie

Posted on November 13, 2015
Crazies, General Idiocy, Gripes, Nevada, Religion, Sexuality, Violence, Wishes

I Try to Take Revenge at Least Once a Day

Lady: You think wearing the skin of a dead cow is cool or something? You’re promoting murder by wearing that.
Leather jacket guy: I don’t wear this because I like leather. I wear this because I hate cows. My father was gored to death by a bull. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to Burger King.

Blockbuster Video, 14936 North Florida Avenue
Tampa, Florida

Overheard by: Jonathon Flachlinie

Posted on November 4, 2015
Crazies, Florida, Meals and Snacks, Time Management

Also, I Hung up That One Corpse

Secretary : The guys who clean my yard never take any off my plants, because I threaten them, I say ‘If you touch anything, I’ll kill you!’ And they never touch anything since then. Because they’re Haitians, and you know, Haitians scare easy.

1252 Memorial Drive
Coral Gables, Florida