Plump coworker: Hey, what kind did you get?
Slender blonde coworker: I got some sort of nougat. What did you get?
Plump coworker: I got a fudgy!
Slender blonde coworker: What?
Overland Park, Kansas
Overheard by: huh?
Plump coworker: Hey, what kind did you get?
Slender blonde coworker: I got some sort of nougat. What did you get?
Plump coworker: I got a fudgy!
Slender blonde coworker: What?
Overland Park, Kansas
Overheard by: huh?
PC coworker: John is nice, very talented and I think he has a lot to contribute to the project… Now he's been brought in.
Honest coworker: I think he's a shit-for-brains, knob jockey.
PC coworker: …yeah, me too.
Grenfell
Adelaide
Australia
Overheard by: PC to the end
Office worker #1, mourning: So when he went to bed, the tumor moved, causing him to die in his sleep.
Office worker #2, in sympathy: Aw, that's sad. Well, at least he died in his sleep. That's the best way to go.
Office worker #3: I want to be eaten by sharks.
Dublin, Ohio
Girl employee #1: Yeah, so I went to visit my boyfriend in jail last night and they had to drug test me to make sure I wasn't smuggling anything for him or whatever, and so they swabbed my arms, and it came back positive for heroin!
Girl employee #2: Oh, weird!
Girl employee #1: I know! I don't even know what heroin looks like!
Vancouver
British Columbia
Canadia
Overheard by: very concerned
Coworker, over cubicle wall: That's where I got licked by a marmot.
Provo, Utah
Pregnant employee at coworker's baby shower: Oh, an anti-roll pillow! Thank you!
Male employee: What's it for?
Pregnant employee: To keep the baby from rolling onto his stomach and possibly suffocating in the crib.
Chatty woman: My two babies died from sleeping on their stomachs.
(stunned silence)
Chatty woman: Just kidding! (laughs)
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: office monkey extraordinaire
Coworker #1: I don't get paying money to play WoW. You're essentially paying for the satisfaction of clicking a button.
Coworker #2: Exactly, that's why I use that money for porn.
Coworker #1: True, at least when you're done with porn you have something to show for it.
Rochester, New York
Overheard by: Rick
Coworker #1: What are you talking about?
Coworker #2: I'm telling them how my parents almost aborted me.
Coworker #3, walking in: What are you guys talking about?
Coworker #2: It's a survival story!
Branchburg, New Jersey
Female coworker: So how's your wife?
Male coworker: Not good, actually.
Female coworker: Why, what's up?
Male coworker: Well, she's having pains…in her… Ummmm…baby area. Ummm…you know.
Brooklyn Center, Minnesota
Overheard by: adelhiede
