Employee: Bridget's out on maternity leave again? That woman is fertile!
Boss: Yeah, I know where to come if I want to have more kids.
Bellevue, Washington
Employee: Bridget's out on maternity leave again? That woman is fertile!
Boss: Yeah, I know where to come if I want to have more kids.
Bellevue, Washington
Manager: One of these days, I'm gonna stuff you with candy… I'm gonna hang you by your toes and beat you like a piñata.
Washington, DC
New hire: Can't we maybe be more optimistic about the sales projections?
Boss: Optimism? Optimism? Optimism is just lack of information.
Washington, DC
Boss to web developer: Didn't we do that site for… For… Ugh… You know… Dick bag motherfucker…
Web developer: Um… No… I don't remember doing anything for Dick Bag motherfucker.
Red Bank, New Jersey
Manager, training new employee: If they call and are interested in strap-on play and ask for, say, mistress Lola, tell them she's been roaming the halls with her strap-on, humping the walls.
New employee, with wide eyes: Really?
Established employee, passing by: Only on Sundays.
Grand & Ogden
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Yes, It's a BDSM Dungeon
Office girl #1: Anyway, that's how this giant hoo-hah got started in the first place.
(snickering comes from nearby cubicles)
Office girl #1: What? Did I use the wrong word?
Office girl #2: Well, that depends on what you're talking about.
Boss man: I think you mean 'hoopla,” but you basically just said “giant vagina.”
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Overheard by: freudianflip
Warehouse manager to engineer: Hello, Vice President tight pants! (salutes)
Aliso Viejo, California
Worker: So, what's the plan for today?
Boss (loudly): Same thing as always. (now quietly) …try to take over the world.
Brooklyn Army Terminal
New York City, New York
Determined supervisor, about crazy union employee: I'm gonna go get her! I'm not afraid of her anymore.
Kansas City, Missouri
Library patron: It's not fucking inappropriate, it's fucking basketball!
Plymouth, New Hampshire
