He Used to Say “Sausage,” but That Led to Trouble

Conductor: Tickets, please… Or in lieu of tickets, breakfast sandwiches will be accepted.

Chicago-bound commuter train

Overheard by: Pirate Alice

Posted on March 4, 2015
Blue Collar, Human Resources, Illinois, Meals and Snacks, Offers and requests

My Father’s Father is a Lesbian

Two maintenance guys arrive to vacuum a cubicle after part of the ceiling fell.

Maintenance guy, 40s: See, he’s what you’d call a male chauvinist pig. He thinks vacuuming is something that a woman should do. Now, I don’t look like no woman.
Maintenance guy, 20s: No, but you look like a dyke.
Maintenance guy, 40s: I look like a dyke?
Maintenance guy, 20s: Easy, Grandpa, easy!
Maintenance guy, 40s: Oh, I’m Grandpa now?

350 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Posted on March 1, 2015
Blue Collar, Gripes, Health & Hygiene, Insults, New York

He Gets Smarter When He Drinks

Frat boy: Gimme something like a whiskey sour but dont put Jack Daniels or anything like that in it. I dont like whiskey!
Bartender: Well what you want in it instead of whiskey?
Frat boy: Use Jim Beam, I fucking love Jim Beam!

Evolution Nightclub
Athens, Ohio

Overheard by: Melvin

Posted on February 11, 2015
Blue Collar, Dumb Customers, General Idiocy, Offers and requests, Ohio, Substance Use & Abuse

The Happy Side Effect Of Running a Floor Buffer

Desk drone to janitor: What's up, Kevin?
Janitor: Not much, 'cept me, maybe.

Lebanon, New Hampshire

Posted on January 20, 2015
Blue Collar, Employees, New Hampshire, Questions, Words

“Making a Sandwich,” You Say?

Customer, looking at a damaged mobile home: How did that happen?
Mechanic: The guy put it on cruise control and went into the back to make a sandwich.

Repair Center
England

Overheard by: Rob

Posted on January 16, 2015
Accidents, Blue Collar, Customers, England, Meals and Snacks, Questions

You Trespass on My Domain at Your Own Risk

Receptionist: Steve, you have to dial 8 before you send a fax, or it won't work.
Mechanic: Even when you dial long distance?
Receptionist: Even when you dial long distance.
Mechanic: But I sent a fax yesterday without dialing 8.
Receptionist: No, you didn't. I got annoyed and put it in the shredder after you walked off and left it beeping.
Mechanic: I guess thats why he didn't get the fax…
Receptionist: Yeah, I guess thats why.

Indianapolis, Indianapolis

Posted on January 15, 2015
Advice, Blue Collar, Indiana, Questions, Receptionists, Technology

Do We Ever!

Office manager to locksmith: You're the guys who service my back door, right?

Portland, Oregon

Posted on December 8, 2014
Blue Collar, Body Parts, Bosses, Oregon, Questions, Sexuality, Weirdness

…Or a White Dustin Diamond.

Worker #1: That guy last night was kind of weird.
Worker #2: He was like a black Urkel!
Worker #1: Right.

Wisconsin Dells, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Brush up on old sitcoms people

Posted on November 25, 2014
Blue Collar, Compare and contrast, Gossip, Race, Wisconsin

They’ve Got the Coroner on Speed-dial

Maintenance guy on cell: There’s too many overloaded powerstrips in this building and all of the fire extinguishers are expired…you want me to call somebody?

1040 Old Yellow Creek Road
Vanleer, Tennessee

Overheard by: beth lankford

Posted on November 24, 2014
Blue Collar, General Idiocy, On the phone, Questions, Tennessee

Does “I Was Taking a Crap on the Laser Printer” Count as an Alibi?

Cleaning guy: Who peed in the trash can this time?

5780 Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi

Overheard by: Brain Dancing

Posted on November 6, 2014
Blue Collar, Mississippi, Questions, Restroom

Blue Collar