Raise Your Hand If You'd Rather Work in an Office Behind a Locked Door

Cube dweller woman #1: Wanna see my baby? Wanna see my baby?
(few moments pass)
Cube dweller woman #2: Those are some big nuts!
(few moments pass)
Cube dweller woman #1: Do you want to lick them?

Golden Valley, Maryland

Posted on December 6, 2015
Coworkers, Maryland, Offers and requests, Questions, Sexuality, Words

Whatever You Say, Richard Gere.

30-something communications manager: I've learned to love my wild gay hairs… “Gray” hairs!

Las Vegas, Nevada

Overheard by: Sex Writer Goddess

Posted on December 5, 2015
Bosses, Colors, Nevada, Physical Appearance, Sexuality, Words

3PM Call Bankruptcy Court

Secretary: Line 1 is Donna with the Bank of Sea Court.

212 West First Street
Portales, New Mexico

Posted on November 21, 2015
General Idiocy, New Mexico, Receptionists, Words

I Won’t Even Sleep with a Man Who’s Had Braces

Grad student: I’m just incapable of mounting anything remotely straight.

3400 North Charles Street
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

Posted on November 19, 2015
Maryland, Possible Sexual Harassment, Students, Words

…As Clearly Stated in Our Company's Annual Narrative Report.

VP in meeting: She came underneath me.

Vienna, Virginia

Overheard by: Giggling note-taker

Posted on November 19, 2015
Bosses, Meetings, Sexuality, Virginia, Words

Oh, the Snickermanity!

Programmer, in otherwise quiet office: Wait, what? How is that “snickerdoodle” isn't in my phone's T9?

Mesa, Arizona

Overheard by: Chris Cardinal

Posted on November 17, 2015
Arizona, Meals and Snacks, On the phone, Questions, Tech People, Words

Hello, Dream Job

Boss: Well, after the truckers release their load, they need their hoses to be blown down.
Female intern, trying not to laugh: Hmm, well, that does make sense…

Calgary
Canadia

Posted on November 13, 2015
Body Parts, Bosses, Canadia, Interns & Temps, Sexuality, Weirdness, Words

Raise Your Hand If You Think “Yeah” Is Still Unprofessional

Boss, reading through company e-mails: Can I talk to you about this e-mail you sent to a client?
Employee: Sure.
Boss: In this e-mail you started out with the word “yay”; when I read this it struck me as very unprofessional. You shouldn't use the word “yay” when speaking with our clients.
Employee: That doesn't say “yay, it says “yeah”. It's a response to a question the client had.
Boss: Y-e-a-h is “yay.” Let's not use it in e-mails in the future, okay?
Employee: Okay (then under breath as he walks away) Fucking moron!

Salt Lake City, Utah