Your Gold Metal Bikini Just Brings That Out in Me

Man #1: O-chu-daa.
Man #2: Huh?
Man #1: Tee-wanna-wunga.
Man #2: Dude, get out of here. You’re speaking Hutt!

Lexington Ave
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Ethan

Posted on May 5, 2008
Default, Language barrier, New York, Offers and requests, Weirdness, Words

Like You Should Judge, Mr “ILuvKittens5”?

Coworker #1: So what’s your e-mail address?
Coworker #2: [Gives it to him.]Coworker #1: Cool… How did you choose that?
Coworker #2: Oh, it means “big fart” in Chinese…

Santa Rosa, California

Posted on May 1, 2008
California, Compliments, Coworkers, Default, Language barrier, Questions, Technology, Weirdness, Words

Fine, Die, You Random Son of a Bitch

Office crony #1: Did you hear about the mid-air collision in California?
Office crony #2: Briefly, why?
Office crony #1: I wonder if there’s anyone out in California I don’t like?
Office crony #2: I don’t think so.
Office crony #1: Just my luck…

West Cummings Park
Woburn, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Chuckie Choo

Posted on May 1, 2008
Accidents, Coworkers, Death, Default, Feelings, Geography & History, Massachusetts, Questions, Weirdness, Wishes

And She Was Totally Ungrateful About Last Year’s Weight Watchers Subscription

Thoughtful receptionist: What are you getting your wife for Valentine’s Day?
Sales shark: Nothing. She’s already my wife.

Madison Avenue
New York City, New York

Posted on April 30, 2008
Default, Holidays, New York, Questions, Receptionists, Relationships, Sales, Weirdness

A Tom Jones Song Is Never Called for in the Office

Female employee: [Burps loudly.]Male employee: Ooh, sexy! [Singing.] She’s a lady! Whoa whoa whoa!

Boylston Street
Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on April 29, 2008
Compliments, Coworkers, Default, Employees, Massachusetts, Sexuality, Weirdness

Thus Following the Golden Rule.

Office drone: Ahhhh crap! I peed on the floor. If I knew I was going to pee on the floor today, I’d never have come to work.

From within a Stall in the Men’s Restroom, Office Building
Rochester, Minnesota

Posted on April 29, 2008
Cubicles, Default, Employees, Gripes, Health & Hygiene, Minnesota, Restroom, Weirdness

Employee Evaluation: “Jake Does Gouda Work.”

Boss: I smell your cheese… Or your feet.
Employee: Really? I ate it twenty minutes ago… Wait… What?

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: LOL

Posted on April 25, 2008
Body Parts, Bosses, Default, Employees, Illinois, Meals and Snacks, Questions, Sensory Experiences, Weirdness, Words

I Don’t Even Try to Fit in Anymore

Coworker #1: Yeah, we should go ahead and fix that. Then, when we’re done, we could dance around it like pagans.
Coworker #2: What? I don’t even know what to say to you sometimes.
Coworker #1: Just stand back and pity my mother.

Washington, DC