Loud British coworker: Bongs? Is that even a word, “bongs”? “Bongs”? Well I guess it is, like you can “bongs” a drum.
Swiftwater, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: wookie
Loud British coworker: Bongs? Is that even a word, “bongs”? “Bongs”? Well I guess it is, like you can “bongs” a drum.
Swiftwater, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: wookie
Male coworker #1: I don't care how much of a bitch she is, her tits are unbelievable.
Male coworker #2: Shit, did you see that red thing she was wearing yesterday? I had to jerk off in the bathroom during lunch.
Female coworker they're talking about: You guys are aware that I can hear you, right?
Male coworker #1: In our own defense, we weren't aware of that.
Chelmsford, Massachusetts
Overheard by:
(male admin yawns)
Female admin: Nap time?
Male admin: I never sleep.
Female admin: You never sleep? What, do you put toothpicks in your eyes to keep them open?
Male admin: I'm going to write that down, that's a good idea.
Female admin: At least you choose to stay awake, rather than your husband waking you up by coming home at 1:30 in the morning.
Male admin: At least he didn't pee in the bed.
New York City, New York
White office dude: What do a roll of sod and a 200-pound white chick have in common?
Mexican office dude: I dunno. What?
White office dude: Sooner or later they both get laid by a Mexican.
Mexican office dude: You know, that joke would be really funny if it weren't so true.
Employee Parking Garage
Downers Grove, Illinois
Office worker: Okay, who started the cookie rumor? I have 45 people coming to my desk asking me for some cookies that I made!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: maryk
Female Facebook coworker: My old professor just Facebooked me.
Male non-Facebook coworker: That sounds wrong. Is that like a dirty Sancho or something?
Female Facebook coworker: It's Sanchez. And no.
Wacker Drive
Chicago Illinois
Overheard by: Hear No Evil
(coworker is walking down the corridor with 3-D glasses on)
Girl: That's a bit odd. Does he realize he's only going to see things in color, not in 3-D?
Guy: You didn't just say that.
Girl: What?
Guy: Well, how many dimensions do you think I am?
Girl: One.
Portland, Oregon
Boss to secretary: You know what I still have?
Secretary: Herpes.
Boss: Uh, err, get back to work!
Mullica Hill Road
Glassboro, New Jersey
Drunk girl: How am I going to get home? I don't have enough money! Oh, except for the thousands of dollars falling out of my ass.
Chicago, Illinois
Nurse: Do you smoke?
Older man: No.
Nurse: Have you ever smoked?
Older man: Yes.
Nurse: And how many cigarettes a day did you smoke?
Older man: Uh, three. No, five. A pack.
Nurse: And when did you quit?
Older man: Uh, yesterday.
Nurse: You're still smoking, aren't you?
Older man: Yes.
Hospital
Harlem, New York
Overheard by: Natalie
