Staff member: I love baklava. Have you ever had the vegan baklava? It's so good!
Grad student: I don't think I've had vegan anything.
Staff member: I think it's made from hemp or something. I wonder if it's okay to eat it and then come to work.
Grad student: I don't know.
Staff member, pretending to be high: You'd be like, “Woooah! Heeeey!”
Grad student, joining in: Woooooaaaaahhh!
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: How do these people make it through college?
Lauren*: So I went on this diet and I was eating cream of mushroom soup. And I thought, “wow, this is awfully thick. It's like pudding!” Then I realized you're supposed to put water in it.
Boss: Jesus Christ, Lauren*!
Lauren*: I know, right?
Boss: Why did we hire you again?
Fontana, California
Overheard by: Aeirlys
Developer: Is “buttload” hyphenated?
New guy: No, I think it's just one word.
Corner of State & Water
Peoria, Illinois
Overheard by: only girl in an office of men…
Admin: Do you need help with anything?
Engineer: Nobody ever asks that here. What are you up to?
Anchorage, Alaska
Overheard by: Overworked
Co-worker: Hey [Trish], can you come here a sec?
Office Manager: Yeah, where are you?
Co-worker: I’m in the closet.
155 6th Avenue
New York, NY
Cube monkey: Why do things that happen to stupid people always happen to me?
Sex Toy Company
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Sex Writer Goddess
Office worker: Do you know what that meeting was about?
Manager: Nope.
Office worker: But, what did we talk about?
Manager: Don’t know, don’t care, anyway, the cookies were nice.
Office worker: They were, weren’t they?
Bezuidenhoutseweg
The Hague
The Netherlands
Overheard by: bewildered
Customer: Ummm… What's in a veggie sandwich?
(short pause)
Employee: Uh, veggies.
(short pause)
Customer: Oh. Okay. I'll have a veggie sandwich.
Subway Sandwich Shop
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: 'Chelle
Caller: I'm calling to talk to the woman I talked to last week. I can't remember her name.
(pause) I don't know…did I call the right place?
Richmond, Virginia
