Attorney: What are we supposed to say when withdrawing? “I’m sorry, Your Honor, but it seems my client has fled the country”?
319 West Woodlawn Avenue
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: J.C. Tabler
Attorney: What are we supposed to say when withdrawing? “I’m sorry, Your Honor, but it seems my client has fled the country”?
319 West Woodlawn Avenue
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: J.C. Tabler
Coworker on phone: I don't remember…do your people all wear those rubber latex gloves?
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Yikes! Who is she talking to?
Employee #1: My god, I smell something.
Employee #2: Does it smell like scent?
Employee #1: Yeah.
Employee #2: Don't worry, it was me and Kevin having a deodorant war.
Downtown Toronto
Canadia
Oldest employee: You know the structure of the company? Can you tell me who our President is?
Young employee: Your son.
Port Washington, New York
Overheard by: Chenga
Awkward bald man, walking into conference room: Does this work for you?
Obviously lesbian woman meeting with him: Whatever you want, this is all about you.
Awkward bald man: Wow! I wish my wife would say that! She never says anything like that.
Richmond, Virginia
Adviser: Okay, is everyone here? Great. So, John*, why don't you tell us what you've worked on this week?
John: Well, I did…
Adviser, interrupting: Actually, John, I'm just going to hummer you for a minute while I show them the data.
Female grad student: Um, what?
Adviser: I'm going to hummer him and just show everyone this, you know, like run over him like a big fucking car.
Female grad student: Uh, okay, but you can't say that.
Adviser: What? Why?
Female grad student: I'll tell you after lab meeting.
Adviser, angrily: What is so bad about saying that? Is it like mean or something to “hummer” someone?
Female grad student: Well it's not mean, it's just… Yeah, don't say that. Ever. We'll talk later.
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Co-worker #1: Are we loud in meetings?
Co-worker #2: Some of us are.
Co-worker #1: Let me correct that: are we allowed in meetings?
3650 131st Avenue SE
Bellevue, Washington
Peon #1: He was basically using the frog as a Fleshlight.
Peon #2: What's a Fleshlight?
Allston, Massachusetts
Boss on phone: I dreamed about pork last night… Is that weird?
Adelaide
Australia
