File Clerk: Are there many good benifits for joining Mensa? It looks like I have the option, but wonder if it is worth the effort.
Attorney: I believe one of the admission requirements is being able to figure out if it’s worth it.
1445 Ross Avenue
Dallas, Texas
Attorney #1: Does anyone know why I can’t access my computer’s S drive?
Attorney #2: Oh, I know the problem. It’s an operator error!
Attorney #1: What does that mean?
Madera, California
Overheard by: Shawn
Secretary: Hey how you doing?
Lawyer: Oh, you know, just livin' the dream.
Secretary: What dream is that?
Lawyer: I'm not sure.
Secretary: Okay. Let me know when you figure it out.
Lawyer: Okay. I will.
Dallas Texas
Attorney to departing secretary: If I had known you get cake when you leave, I would have quit years ago!
Indiana
Overheard by: If only we'd known sooner…
Secretary: I’ve been meaning to ask you a question.
Lawyer: Sure, what’s up?
Secretary: So you’re Indian, right? I’m going to an Indian funeral today. And I’m not sure how to act.
Lawyer: Well…you’re not supposed to laugh.
Secretary: But they’re so Indian that they’re going to have her cremated.
Lawyer: That doesn’t mean you can laugh. Also wear all white.
1425 K Street NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: callmeahab
Lawyer on phone: …No…No….They can’t take your kids away for smokin’ pot, that’s bullshit…Ha, ha, ha!
500 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Very country legal assistant to hearing office rep: Well… That Irene Davis and I have been commuting.
Hearing office rep: What?
Very country legal assistant: Commuting… Ya know, talking.
Law Firm
Lower Alabama
Overheard by: How embarassing for the rest of us
Lawyer: If he was downstairs in the Girl Scout’s uniform, that would’ve been even better.
43rd Street and Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Paralegal: What color is mozzarella?
Office manager: White, why?
Paralegal: Ummm…I'm going to need an extra bag, I am cleaning the fridge and that bag of mozzarella is like dark brown and green, and I don't mean spots…
Office manager: Uh-uh, here. (hands over bag) I hope it doesn't start moving.
(paralegal laughs and heads toward kitchen)
Paralegal (one minute later): Hey, what color is kiwi suppose to be?
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: joey
Judge, on the bench: This is not a court of justice! This is a court of law!
Elyria, Ohio
