Shocked security guard: You gave it to me?! You gave me the cooties!
28 East 28th Street
New York, New York
Shocked security guard: You gave it to me?! You gave me the cooties!
28 East 28th Street
New York, New York
Receptionist: God, I love today.
Supervisor: You know, I hate it when you get laid.
Receptionist, blushing: Yeah, I know…
General manager: You're just saying that because your wife won't put out.
Supervisor: That's not really funny.
General manager: Yeah, it is… If we were lucky, Tammy here would hire out, then everyone could get laid.
Roswell, New Mexico
Overheard by: Yikes!
Flood vic #1: So I said to my boss, “I won’t be able to make the meeting in NYC, because my house is flooded and I had to evacuate.”
Flood vic #2: So what did she say?
Flood vic #1: She said that she was stressed out about having to cancel the meeting and incoveniencing the people in NYC.
Flood shelter cot
Overheard by: sitting on a cot waiting for Noah.
Female employee: What the hell is she fussing at? He’s only two years older than her. If he’s old, she’s old!
Office manager: She’s just trying to ruffle your feathers.
Sales guy: You should tell her your husband can beat up her husband.
Assistant: Which one? She’s got a couple.
Female employee: Hey!
Sales guy: Haha, I forgot she’s got like three husbands now.
Female employee: I hate you guys.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Co-worker #1: Ah, beat me to it!
Co-worker #2: Yeah, it’s the little victories that get you through the day.
Co-worker #3: …Yeah, that or drugs.
375 Hudson Street
New York, NY
Overheard by: Paul Lamb
Employee: Your in-box is not intended to be a point on the Bermunda Triangle.
5760 Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
Architect: Did you see the dog?
Intern: Yeah, he slobbered on my pant leg.
Architect: I sent you because I didn’t want to get bit.
Square Lake Road
Bloomfield Hills, Michigan
Overheard by: Eero Plain
Girl #1: You know that gay guy that works second shift?
Girl #2: Yeah, what about him?
Girl #1: I took him out to meet all my hetero friends, and they enjoyed the shit out of him.
2800 East 28th Street
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: snorted my diet mountain dew
Secretary: Bye, guys. See you tomorrow.
Worker #1: Who the fuck was that?
Worker #2: The new sales secretary; she took [Carrie]’s place.
Worker #1: Who the fuck is [Carrie]?
Worker #2: She took over for [Gretchen].
Worker #1: Oh, hell. I don’t care about chicks’ names. I only care if I’m sleeping with them. And then sometimes I have to get up and check their purse for ID.
1313 North Industrial Boulevard
Dallas, Texas
HR person: Here’s your office. There are some shelves on order and they should be in next week, so you’ll have to do with the desk and credenza.
New employee: But I thought I was getting a cubicle.
1701 1st Avenue
Rock Island, Illinois
Overheard by: Holly Sparkman
