Co-worker #1: I just got this great book you should read. It’s got
everything you always wanted to know about sex. It’s got pictures and
positions and everything.
Co-worker #2: Books are for amateurs. When it comes to sex I’m a pro.
1215 2nd Avenue
Nashville, Tennessee
Coworker: So then he came home with all these bags of groceries, all proud, and after he got them all put away, I was like, ‘That’s not groceries! That’s meat and a pineapple!’
1450 Energy Park Drive
St. Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: JoJo
Female sales exec: Did you get that e-mail I sent you?
Male sales exec: Yeah.
Female sales exec: What’d you think?
Male sales exec: I’d give it a 90 percent.
Female sales exec: What made you take 10 off?
Male sales exec: It didn’t say anything about Jesus being the savior. I mean, that’s why we celebrate Christmas. You can’t have Christmas without Easter.
Female sales exec: Oh.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: So I can’t call it Xmas?
Worker on phone: I’m sorry, we can’t hire you…It’s not that, it’s just that I don’t want to work with you.
3838 NW 13th Street
Gainesville, Florida
Architect on phone: Alright, you’re not understanding me. [pause] Okay, what if I keep this one, but eat the other one… Look, I just need to know can I get any diseases or bacteria from these kittens or what?
2020 South King Street
Honolulu, Hawaii
Overheard by: crackin up
Employee: Mondays come way too often.
Supervisor: Yes, once a week.
4708 Lacey Bpulevard SE
Lacey, Washington
Overheard by: Chris Shard
Boss: I told you not to shit in the bathroom.
1123 Broadway
New York, NY
Department head to HR manager: I don’t fucking care who caught Drew* doing who or what in the bathroom! You do not drug test editors two weeks before the deadline!
McKemey Road
Chandler, Arizona
Dude: I registered to win a trip to space, and I haven’t heard anything. I’m very disappointed.
270 Lafayette Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: Jas Bohrman
Coworker, sighing: I don't mind if you talk in the office as long as you're not talking to me…
Broadway & Waverly
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Emily
