Friendly staff: Sir, we fix everything but water damage.
Hippie traveler: Uh, well, I drooled on it.
Bangkok
Thailand
Friendly staff: Sir, we fix everything but water damage.
Hippie traveler: Uh, well, I drooled on it.
Bangkok
Thailand
Borders customer: It's by… I don't know her name, but she's the new Poet Laureate.
Borders clerk: Her name is “Laureate”?
Borders customer, sighing: Never mind.
Sunnyvale, California
Counselor: Oh, I read about a blind couple that sailed to Australia without any assistance!
Secretary: They think it's Australia. Their kids just pulled them around the harbor for a few days, and took them to outback.
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Sandy Paws
Employee #1: It's 5 O'clock somewhere!
Employee #2: It's 5 O'clock at my desk. What do you think this water in my bottle here is?
Glendale, California
Female cube monkey: He got his medulla oblongata pierced!
Beech Grove, Indiana
Overheard by: a different department
Admin on phone with daughter: Sure, you can go to Puerto Rico with the Jones*. (pause) How far is Puerto Rico, anyways? (pause) It's not really that far, right? It's like, part of the US, but it's one of those things–like a stepchild.
Lutherville, Maryland
Flamboyant marketing director: In my opinion, prostitutes are great because they help my liver. Let me explain–it cuts the process in half. I don't have to waste my money buying drinks for guys at the bar that still might not sleep with me. So… in the end, my liver is healthier because of prostitutes.
Old lady assistant: Prosciutto is good for the liver? I'll put it in a salad!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Lowly Intern
Male coworker, carrying apple and pear into break room: Who took my banana?
Ridge, New York
Boss, about to hang up on someone calling into the meeting: Is there anything else?
Colleague: No, I think I'm done.
Boss: Good, 'cause I got my finger on the button over here. I feel like the little boy with his finger in the dike.
Washington, DC
Blonde coworker: And I was like “way to throw me under the rug!”
Brunette coworker: Umm… it's “under the bus.” “Way to throw me under the bus.”
Male coworker: Get it? It hurts. If you were thrown under a bus it would hurt.
Blonde coworker: Well, it would hurt if someone was walking on the rug and you was under it!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: jen
