Co-worker #1: What is our Vision Statement?
Co-worker #2: It says here, “Our Vision is to always be true to our Vision.”
101 South Webster Street
Madison, Wisconsin
Co-worker #1: What is our Vision Statement?
Co-worker #2: It says here, “Our Vision is to always be true to our Vision.”
101 South Webster Street
Madison, Wisconsin
Graphics guy: What format are these files?
Boss: They’re from the guy next door.
Graphics guy: Okay, but what kind of files are these supposed to be? There’s no extensions so I can’t open them in anything unless I rename them all and just guess the extension until I get it right.
Boss: Can you open them and check?
2245 Royal Windsor Drive
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Bob
Salesperson #1: Violence is okay…just as long as no one is enjoying it.
Salesperson #2: What about spanking?
850 Third Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Effina
Four-year-old holing up a toy: Mommy, can I get this?
Mom: It says it’s for kids ages eight and up. How old are you?
Four-year-old: Um… eight.
RadioShack
California
Overheard by: SK
Male coworker: Do you have any hot girlfriends?
Female coworker: Why?
Male coworker: I need a date to the Christmas party. She needs to be hot, so that I can make all the other guys jealous. Conservative hicks.
Female coworker: Passive aggressive, much? And no, I won't submit my friends to you evil desires.
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: Female Peon
Boss: Notice anything different about your blazer today?
Employee: No.
Boss: Well, I sewed it for you.
Employee: What? When?
Boss: Oh, a month or two ago, when you were out of the office for the day. You left it here, so I took it and sewed it.
Employee: Um, thanks.
300 Massachusetts Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
Japanese professor: The peroxides are very volatile. If you drop them, we have to be out of the building before they hit the floor.
Grad student: I won’t drop them.
Japanese professor: And only Japanese ninja can move that fast.
Grad student: OK.
Japanese professor: I am well trained in the art of the ninja.
10900 Euclid Avenue
Cleveland, Ohio
Employee #1: I don’t understand what his problem is…
Employee #2: His problem? He’s low-level and he’s stupid.
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: CB
Coworker #1, eating lunch: What have you got there? Steak?
Coworker #2: No, it's lamb.
Coworker #1: What's the difference?
Coworker #2: It comes from a lamb.
Waltham, Massachusetts
Employee #1: I always thought it was pronounced “fass-mile”. What is it?
Employee #2: Facsimile. It’s a fax.
Employee #1: Oh, I’ve never heard it called that before.
50 Oak Court
Danville, California
