Coworker #1: Dammit! I hate being poisoned!
Coworker #2: You know, something tells me that you aren’t doing paperwork.
460 Canning Highway
Perth, Australia
Coworker #1: Dammit! I hate being poisoned!
Coworker #2: You know, something tells me that you aren’t doing paperwork.
460 Canning Highway
Perth, Australia
Guy on cell: You have to pull the door and then turn the key. (pause) Did the key break off in the lock? (pause) Look at your key. Is half of it missing?
West Jefferson
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Kazmeyer
Lady: Where are the eggs?
Sales rep at grocery store: I’m sorry, I don’t work here.
Lady, turning to husband: She doesn’t speak English.
Sales rep: No ma’am, I don’t work here.
1300 Elmhurst Road
Des Plaines, Illinois
Co-worker: He could do that job with one eye shut and one eye tied behind his back.
Rubislaw House
Anderson Drive
Aberdeen, Aberdeenshire
UK
Waiter #1: My cherry popped in my mouth.
Waiter #2: That's what she said.
British Columbia
Canadia
Blonde: Mmm… It smells so good in here. Doesn’t it smell good in here? I love it! I just want to eat what’s in my nose right now!
Friend: I know!
Arkansas
Co-worker #1: “Urban” doesn’t mean “black.”
Co-worker #2: Yes it does.
9111 East Douglas Avenue
Wichita, Kansas
Overheard by: Nate
Guy in stall, answering cell: Wassup? (pause) Taking a crap. (pause) No. In the bathroom.
Herndon, Virginia
Manager: Hey there! How are you feeling about your second day?
Intern: Whelmed.
Manager: I’m sorry, what was that?
Intern: Whelmed. You know, you can be “overwhelmed” and “underwhelmed,” but I’m just “whelmed.”
Manager: I see. Well, maybe some coffee would help?
1400 16th Street NW
Washington, DC
Co-worker: I want my job to be the guy who kicks George Bush in the face all day, only stopping to make out with him.
50 Main Street
Hackensack, New Jersey
