Guy in charge of van duty: You're going to be the next… (next words muffled by van engines)
Girl assisting van duty: Did you just tell me I'm going to be in epic porn?
Guy: What? No! I said “admin coord.” You're not going to go to HR, are you?
Girl: No, I'm actually a little flattered.
Marginal Way
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: porn star
Hot secretary #1: I think if you push “release,” the call goes away.
Hot secretary #2: I wish I had a “release” button… then I might not have to fake it with my boyfriend.
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: JDeez
Boss in special activities division: The short answer is: it's classified.
Bearded man: What's the long answer?
Boss: The long answer is: it's classified, and I don't like you.
CIA Headquarters
Langley, Virginia
Overheard by: John Alejandro King
Father mechanic: You sound like your mother.
Son mechanic: Yeah, but I'm not throwing an iron at you. Or a dictionary.
Father mechanic: I loved her until then.
Car Dealership
Oakville, Ontario
Canadia
Engaged young man: I don't think she even likes me.
Older married man: If she liked you, she would never marry you.
Boston, Massachusetts
Boss: I'm jealous, I wish I had a colon infection.
Falls Church, Virginia
Working bee: But I'm cute and friendly and everyone should just love me! Damn it!
University of Illinois
Little old Indian professor, struggling to set up lecture on Excel: I am feeling retarded. This is why I don't use those iPods and stuff…I am afraid.
Tufts University
Medford/Somerville, Massachusetts
Overheard by: microsoft excel is pretty evil
Store manager: These new shoes make me feel like I'm walking on dead babies. (pause) You know, before they hit rigor mortis.
Kitchener
Canadia
Overheard by: Drewerd
HR director: You look like hell. I mean, seriously exhausted.
HR manager: Thanks. That makes me feel tons better. Let me try it–you look like you're coming off of a three-day bender!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
