Friendly staff: Sir, we fix everything but water damage.
Hippie traveler: Uh, well, I drooled on it.
Bangkok
Thailand
Friendly staff: Sir, we fix everything but water damage.
Hippie traveler: Uh, well, I drooled on it.
Bangkok
Thailand
Boss man: There's a men's bathroom and a women's bathroom. I don't want to see anyone using the women's bathroom… Use the men's room.
Worker: You talking to me? Are you saying I use the women's room? I don't! Who told you that?
Boss man: I don't know who it is. I don't care. Just use the men's bathroom.
Worker: Is it me? Cuz you're looking at me.
Boss man: Fine, it's you. Don't use the women's bathroom.
Worker: Who told you I was using the women's bathroom? I don't use the women's bathroom.
Boss man: I didn't say it was you, but if you think it was you, it was you. Don't use the womens bathroom.
Newark, New Jersey
Employee #1: It's 5 O'clock somewhere!
Employee #2: It's 5 O'clock at my desk. What do you think this water in my bottle here is?
Glendale, California
Female cube monkey: He got his medulla oblongata pierced!
Beech Grove, Indiana
Overheard by: a different department
Seemingly normal customer: It's revealing when the lolly-boxes clatter, isn't it? Revealing!
Cashier: Er, yes. (awkward laughter)
Vegetable Shop
Western Australia
Australia
Overheard by: Cara
Customer: How much does one of those pork chops weigh?
Meat market employee: It depends on how big they are.
Peoria, Illinois
Employee: My hand is starting to tingle. It might be carpal tunnel.
Boss: Stop being a little bitch.
Financial Firm
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Michael
Quiet voice in stall, after long gaseous emission: Thank you, lord.
Melville, New York
Overheard by: dying inside
Employee #1: Otis Redding.
Employee #2: Otis Redding? Who's that?
Employee #3: Isnt' that the guy from Andy Griffith? The drunk guy?
Employee #1: No. Otis Redding sang that “Dock of the Bay” song. His dad shot and killed him.
Employee #2: No. That's Marvin Gaye.
Employee #1: Marvin Gaye? Who's that?
Van Buren, Arkansas
Cafe register girl: If I hadn't opened my legs, it wouldn't have fallen out. And when it did fall, it made a lot of noise!
Austin, Texas
