Office girl #1: Ohmigod, did you hear that Sam Ronson broke up with Lindsay Lohan?
Office girl #2: No. No! Where did you read that?
Awkward office guy, from across office: Aaaand this is why I'm better than you!
Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts
Bossman: Were you able to answer all of her questions?
Worker: No.
Bossman: Why?
Worker: Because I didn’t know what to tell her!
9500 Owensmouth Avenue
Chatsworth, California
Student: It kinda smells like bunnies.
Supervisor: What?
Student: Yeah, bunnies. Haven’t you ever smelled bunnies?
Supervisor: Uh, no, I don’t go around sniffing rodents usually. And besides, I’m congested, so all I’m smelling today is boogers.
1145 E. South Campus Drive
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: Rasputin
Young female worker: Oh! Just the lady I wanted to see!
Mature female worker: Hang on! I have to do something and then I’ll be in my usual cupboard if you want to see me!
Freshwater Place, Southbank
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Nose E Parker
Sales #1: Have you called any previous customers yet?
Sales #2: I’ve called customers till I’m blue in the ass.
973 Opelika Road
Auburn, Alabama
Overheard by: Rob Byrd
Worker #1: Your friend came over. She wanted to borrow a screwdriver.
Worker #2: Why, to shut her fucking mouth?
3600 Las Vegas Blvd South
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Frank Grimes
Automated computer voice on elevator: Second floor. Going down.
Old man: Uh, up yours.
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Up it to what?
Secretary: [The client] keeps calling and asking for me. And you know what? The next time he does that, I’m going to tell him that you lied to him.
Boss: What? Why?
Secretaty: Because you tell him you’re going to do all these things for him, and you don’t!
Boss: That’s because he’s an idiot!
527 West Jefferson Street
Louisville, Kentucky
Female coworker: Dude. What’s with the mutton chops?
Male coworker: Just keepin’ it awesome, babe.
Wausau, Wisconsin
