Exasperated boss on phone: Well that's great, Jake. Maybe I should go downstairs and slam my head in the car door a few times.
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
Exasperated boss on phone: Well that's great, Jake. Maybe I should go downstairs and slam my head in the car door a few times.
Huntington, New York
Overheard by: Lady Lawyer
Boss, about a customer’s outrage at an e-mail: I think it was the “best regards” that sent him over the edge.
Los Angeles, California
Cube dweller to another, shouting after argument: Just because you're mad it doesn't give you the right to be indigent.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: vamp slayer
Female coworker: What's your pet peeve?
Female boss: Men who can't cut their toenails.
Female coworker: Why?
Female boss: Because that means they have beer bellies.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Dyan
Queer peon to coworker: Shut your face or I’ll shit in your throat!
West 38th Street
New York, New York
Older saleswoman, picking up the phone: Hello, this is Sue. How may I help you? Yes? Oh, no! Oh, dear! Definitely! Absolutely, just bring it on in and I’ll take care of it for you. No problem! I’m soooo sorry. I am so, so, so sorry!! [Hangs up phone.] I’m sorry your mother was a prostitute.
Department Store
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: lisa
Woman in accounting who's trying to stop using profanity: Why isn't my computer working? Why won't you print my shit? (pause) Shit! (pause) Dammit!
Fort Mill, South Carolina
Dude: Do you know where your wife is?
Sarge: How the fuck are you gonna walk in here on a Thursday morning, come in my fucking office, see that I'm in the middle of writing a fucking important letter, and ask me where the fuck someone else in this fucking building is. I'm sorry, where the fuck do you see a babysitter sign on my desk?
Dude: I'm sorry, I just…
Sarge: Where the fuck do you see it? Where's the fucking sign?
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Shaye
Client on phone, returning from lunch: What, we have a meeting now? I’ll be there in ten minutes. Is [the boss] around?
Admin: Yeah, he’s right here.
Client: Good, go kick him in the shin for me.
Admin: Um, you’re on speakerphone.
Client: I hate you! How many times have I told you never to put me on speakerphone!?
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Manager on phone: Is Andy* there? (pause) Well, when he gets back, tell him if he schedules an interview when he's not here again, I'll break his legs. (pause) Yeah, you have a good day. (hangs up)
West Lafayette, Indiana
Overheard by: Rachel S.
