Employee to another, giving advice on batting stance: Yeah, you wanna stay straight. No, you don't wanna bend over.
Nashville, Tennessee
IT guy: If you're going to buy a Mac at this place, why don't you just save some money and buy a sack of potatoes instead? They'll both do the same amount of computing and a sack of potatoes is a lot cheaper!
Bethesda, Maryland
Overheard by: IT Chick
Coworker on sales call: Oh, yeah, you keep doing that–that's just too much fun to make you quit!
Franklin, Tennessee
Manager: I'm so stressed I'm going to jump out of the 5th floor window.
Coworker: It's not high enough. You'd need to go to at least the 7th to ensure death.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Team leader to claims adjuster: You know what? Sometimes you just gotta go in there, bend over and say “here, John*, just take me.”
Brentwood, Tennessee
Employee #1: My stepdaughter won over $2000.
Employee #2: What's she gonna do with all that money? She should put it towards college!
Employee #1: She's 13 and a redneck. She ain't goin' to college. Plus, she's fine, so she just needs to find her a good lookin' redneck with lots of money, and she'll be set.
Shreveport, Louisiana
Coworker: It doesn't have to work, we just have to do something!
Manhattan, New York
Manager, training new employees: So… Sexual harassment. Just don't do it.
Dreadlocked newbie: What about dry humping behind the butcher counter?
Escondido, California
Overheard by: This is a health food store…
20-something woman to 50-something coworker: If you didn't want to be so old, you shouldn't have been born so long ago.
Melbourne
Australia
Coworker to another: Don't trust him, he's evil and Singaporean. Double trouble!
Sydney
Australia