Receptionist: What are the new shirts made out?
Clerk: They’re 100% cotton.
Receptionist: Cotton? That’s the stuff that grows on sheep, right?
Clerk: No, cotton comes from rabbits. That’s why they’re called cottontails.
10 Miles South of Battle Mountain
Battle Mountain, Nevada
- Posted on May 7, 2024
- Animals, Comebacks, General Idiocy, Nevada, Physical Appearance, Questions, Receptionists
Boss: She’s gone? And you’re not going to be here tomorrow?
Secretary: Correct.
Boss: But I need counseling.
Designer: I agree!
175 South Third Street
Columbus, Ohio
- Posted on May 7, 2024
- Bosses and Underlings, Gripes, Ohio, Receptionists, Time Management
Teller: So how was your weekend?
Customer: Oh, it was all right…my husband died.
1600 Market Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: indigo
- Posted on May 6, 2024
- Customers, Death, Employees, Pennsylvania, Questions
Project Engineer: If you expect me to do quality work I’m going to need a raise.
10 West Mifflin Street
Madison, Wisconsin
- Posted on May 5, 2024
- Engineers, Money, Offers and requests, Technology, Wisconsin
Regional Director: So our biggest problem last year was we tried to take over the whole world, and the whole world is a big place. We need to think small, concentrate on taking over individual countries first…like Wisconsin.
2100 South Priest Drive
Tempe, Arizona
- Posted on May 4, 2024
- Arizona, Dumb Bosses, General Idiocy, Geography & History, Gripes
Co-worker on phone: Let’s take the new Financial Controller from [the client] out to lunch. Is she cute?…Oh, it’s a guy…Does he have a sense of humor?
680 George Street
Sydney, New South Wales
Australia
- Posted on May 3, 2024
- Advice, Australia, Coworkers, Meals and Snacks, On the phone, Questions
Worker: [Bryan]’s sick today; he IMed me and said he needs one of us to come to his house and give him a sponge bath.
1831 Chestnut Street
St. Louis, Missouri
- Posted on May 2, 2024
- Coworkers, General Idiocy, Health & Hygiene, Missouri, Technology
Administrator: [Les], do you have any overdue surveys?
[Les]: No, I don’t.
Administrator: You don’t have any surveys due before the 26th?
[Les]: No, the only surveys I have were due on the 23rd and the 24th.
811 Russell Avenue
Gaithersburg, Maryland
- Posted on May 1, 2024
- Bosses and Underlings, Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Maryland, Questions, Time Management
Co-worker #1: Didn’t you wear that shirt two days ago?
Co-worker #2: Huh? What? I don’t know…
Co-worker #1: Yeah, I remember you had that sweater on a couple of days back.
Co-worker #2: Did you look that up on www.victoriaknowswhateveryonewears.com? Oh wait, it kicks back to another site, www.gofuckyourselfvictoria.com.
460 West 34th Street
New York, NY
Boss: Okay, it’s nearly 5, so we’re going to take a different approach to the voting this time. After the meeting minutes are completed, I’ll email all of our ideas to everyone tomorrow, and you can email me back your votes for the best one.
Underling: Are we voting today or tomorrow?
425 Park Avenue
New York, NY
- Posted on April 13, 2024
- Bosses and Underlings, General Idiocy, New York
