Coworker, about a newborn: Then her husband cut the Biblical cord…
171 17th Street NW
Guy coworker: So I know after they’ve wiped out the rest of my truck, these thieves are thinking, “We can even steal these $3 sunglasses and pawn them for at least a portion of a rock!“
Girl coworker: Rocks are free, dumbass!
Overheard by: entertained by others’ ignorance
Admin: Do you need help with anything?
Engineer: Nobody ever asks that here. What are you up to?
Overheard by: Overworked
Co‐worker: Hey [Trish], can you come here a sec?
Office Manager: Yeah, where are you?
Co‐worker: I’m in the closet.
155 6th Avenue
New York, NY
Teacher #1: What are they raising all this money for?
Teacher #2: For this lady in the cleaning crew. Apparently, her purse was stolen and she lost nine hundred bucks that she was planning to send home to her family in Mexico.
Teacher #1: Where’s my nine hundred bucks? Since I started working here, I lost everything.
444 Pleasantville Road
Briarcliff Manor, New York
Boss, looking at St. Patrick’s parade: Oh, look, it’s the St. Patrick’s parade, I just love Greek food!
Neptune, New Jersey
Overheard by: Karen
Co‐worker #1: Wow! That’s the longest email I’ve ever gotten from a customer.
Co‐worker #2: Really? What is it?
Co‐worker #1: [Kateunderscorelee]@yahoo.com
Co‐worker #2: That’s not long…Oh! Um, do you know what an “underscore” is? You don’t spell it out.
1001 Roeder Avenue
Overheard by: Chris Shard
Coworker: Crocodiles are carnivores, alligators are vegans.
Jersey City, New Jersey
Middle‐aged coworker to another: So I saw U2 last night… You know, the rock and roll band.
Overheard by: Chris
Customer: I want to pay my bill. I know it’s two months overdue, so I
wanted to come and pay it in person.
Customer Service: According to our records they shut off your cable today.
Customer: But they said I had until today to pay the bill.
Customer Service: Well, your cable has been shut off today.
Customer: But today’s not over yet!
Customer Service: It is for you.
11020 Flatlands Avenue
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: Paul