Co-worker: Where the fuck are the urinals?
Stall: Wrong bathroom, buddy.

1055 North Cruise Boulevard
Port of Miami, Florida

Overheard by: WordPower

Clerk: Why is there a wet floor sign on the carpet?
Supervisor: Sometimes I get excited.
Clerk: I miss working with you. You always know just what to say.

1201 Market Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Jessica Kalup

Admin: Some angry guys are going to come in the office looking for one of the executives. They may threaten you and yell at you but just tell them to go away. Whatever you do, don’t bother us with it.
Receptionist: Okay, while I’m up here fighting for my life, I’ll be sure not to bother you all.

817 West Peachtree Street NW
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Elle George

Division Manager: I hate it when logic happens.

1930 Bishop Lane
Louisville, Kentucky

Overheard by: Doug Whitworth

Editor #1: Should we tell the author we lost that whole section of the manuscript?
Editor #2: No, let’s not announce that we’re incompetent.
Editor #1: Yeah, let’s let it be a surprise.

8700 Shoal Creek Boulevard
Austin, Texas

Co-worker #1: Oh, you have some good supplies. Anything I can steal?
Co-worker #2: Uh, you can have some markers.
Co-worker #1: No, that’s okay; I’ve got markers up the ass.

633 North St. Clair Street
Chicago, Illinois

CTO: My interview article is in USA Today!
Programer: Can you send me the link? Never mind, I’ll just Google “USA Today”.

600 Newport Center Drive
Newport Beach, California

Supervisor: The contact name is “Ding Ding”?
Co-worker: Yes.
Supervisor: And he lives in his car behind K-mart?

1001 Roeder Avenue
Bellingham, Washington

Overheard by: Chris Shard

Sales Manager: How am I supposed to give you the Heimlich if you have your door shut?

2176 Avenue C
Bethlehem, Pennsylvania

Temp: I have a few questions about the PowerPoint project that I’m trying to get my head around.
Manager: Okay.
Temp: So what do you want again?
Manager: I just want a template…Something visual that we can use over and over.
Temp: What do you want in it?
Manager: I don’t know. That’s why I want a template. So I need you to create something that looks like the department standard, with our logo and so on, the right corporate background color, with dummy copy as placeholders.
Temp: So where do I find the words you want in it?
Manager: They don’t exist yet. We’re working on that. That’s why it’s a template and not a final project.
Temp: So what do you want in all the boxes?
Manager: Nothing. Just a place so I can go in and write it. I just want a formatted background and text boxes in place.
Temp: Right, but what should I put in the text boxes?
Manager: Whatever you want.
Temp: So let me get this right: You want me to create a PowerPoint with place for different words.
Manager: Yes.
Temp: But you don’t know what the words are?
Manager: That’s why it’s a template.
Temp: I see. So I will just use one of the PowerPoint templates.
Manager: No. It needs to be in the style of the company. Those are too generic.
Temp: I’m confused.
Manager: It seems so.
Temp: Can I just do it in Word?

111 East 59th Street
New York, NY