Intern on phone: I'm milking this teabag for all it's worth.
Chicago, Illinois
Feminists: Ah-Hah!
Coworker: So they were a nice group of girls.
Boss: Were they bright?
Coworker: Not overly. They were, umm, nice.
Boss: That's good. I like that. (both walk out the door)
Toronto
Canadia
It's Like I'm a Virgin Again!
30-something coworker, happily: So they tell me it's herpes in my eye. I know! They've given me Zovirax for it.
ProRail
Utrecht
Belgium
Overheard by: Thomas van Alphen
It’s Been Oolong Time Since I Embarrassed Myself Like That
Agent: Oh, now I remember why I don’t usually drink pee. It always makes me have to go to the washroom… Tea. Tea! I meant tea!… Fuck you all.
1616 27th Avenue Northeast
Calgary, Alberta, Canada
Overheard by: Didn’t believe him
10AM Meeting with Client
Senior Director: Well, I hate to tell you this, but we’re going to be a week late with your report.
Client on speaker: You fuckin’ serious? The fuck you doing over there? Writing this thing in pen? Sanskrit? The fuck, man?
Senior Director: Actually, I’m chipping it away in stone…hey, don’t you worry about how I’m writing this fucking report! You’ll get it in a week. Who the fuck are you to give me an attitude
Client: Fuck you! Hurry the fuck up! We’re paying your ass, so you should be nice to me!
Senior Director: Kiss my ass!…cock eyed fuck! By the way, how is the wife doing?
51 W. 52nd Street
New York, NY
Then How About a Calzone?
Woman on phone: It’s like asking a rocket scientist to make a pizza–I just can’t do it!
707 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Ilya
Which Means I Don’t Understand the Question
Mortgage rep: And, finally, may I ask you what race you are? Caucasian, African-American…
Customer: I’m Canadian.
Fairfield County, Connecticut
Rumors About the Man in the Yellow Hat Have Been Greatly Exaggerated
Manager: Yes, he's alive because he ate monkey shit.
Granby Street
Norfolk, Virginia
Knew I Shoulda Told Him It Was His Idea
Boss: Hey whackadoo! [pause] Shut the fuck up.
Rochester, Minnesota
Overheard by: Kirby
I’ll Pipe Some Random Noises into Your Earpiece
Admin on speaker: Can I please have the Electronics department?
Sears rep: Okay, hold for a while.
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief