Teacher: That’s an interesting tattoo, Jacob*!
Student #1: Thanks.
Teacher: Are you like the tattooed man from The Great Gatsby?
Student #2, after long pause: Yo, we don’t read!
High school
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: freshman whisperer
- Posted on
- Canadia, General Idiocy, Students, Teachers
Cocktail waitress #1: What’s a late-term abortion?
Cocktail waitress #2: I’m not sure, but I think it’s when you have an abortion when the baby’s being born.
Cocktail waitress #1: Ew! They can do that?! [A few minutes later] Where is Washington state?
Cocktail waitress #2: I think it’s near Seattle…
Cocktail waitress #1: You think they meant to say ‘Washington, DC’?
Cocktail waitress #2: I don’t know, but that’s pretty dumb of them if they did mean DC. People can get confused, you know?
Hotel and casino
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: HannA
- Posted on
- Bimbettes, General Idiocy, Nevada
Applicant: I don’t have a copy of my résumé. A dog threw up on my laptop.
Horsham, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: alxie
- Posted on
- Dumb Employees, Gossip, Pennsylvania
Hot intern #1: You know why I love wearing miniskirts on Mondays?
Hot intern #2: Maybe. Why?
Hot intern #1: Because I can air things out after a weekend of hard work.
Hot intern #2: Oh, hey, I wonder if that would work for me…
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: not getting any
- Posted on
- Health & Hygiene, Illinois, Interns & Temps
CSR: So, what city in Philadelphia are we doing the pickup?
Everett, Massachusetts
Overheard by: OK, I feel smarter now.
- Posted on
- Dumb Employees, Massachusetts, Questions
Cube dweller: Zebrafish! Liquid nitrogen!
Business affairs office
Oregon
Overheard by: research sounds like fun
- Posted on
- Coworkers, General Idiocy, Oregon
Preggers peon: You know, people only think you’re pregnant for nine months, but it’s really ten because you don’t know you’re pregnant for the first month.
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Mic all
- Posted on
- Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Tennessee
CSR: I need, like, four more arms and three more eyeballs. That way I could do more than one thing at a time.
Tempe, Arizona
- Posted on
- Arizona, Customer Service, Gripes
Blonde salesgirl on phone with IT: My computer is not working.
IT guy: Did you plug everything in right?
Blonde salesgirl: Yes! Of course! The light is on, but nothing’s happening. [IT guy goes to her office, bends over, presses power button and walks out.] But the light was on!
IT guy: That’s your screen. The computer is the big box on the floor.
Office, Meilleur Street
Montreal
Canadia
Overheard by: ID-10-T
- Posted on
- Bimbettes, Canadia, Tech People, Technology
Nurse: I have unusually large labia.
Other nurses: Ummm…
Hospital
New Hampshire
Overheard by: I Don’t
- Posted on
- Gossip, New Hampshire, Nurses
