Office chick: How was your weekend?
Office guy: I got a sunburn! Look, my skin is flaking off! [Rubs his arm.]Office chick: Stop! You’re flaking into my coffee!
San Antonio, Texas
- Posted on
- Coworkers, Health & Hygiene, Texas
IT help desk: Mine are nothing like yours. Yours get so fluffy when I put them in my mouth.
500 Howard Street
San Francisco, California
- Posted on
- California, Possible Sexual Harassment, Tech People
Girl answering phone: Hi.
Guy on speaker: Hey… What are you doing?
Girl: Nothing.
Guy: Don’t e-mail me today.
Girl: Why?
Guy: They are using my computer for a presentation.
Girl: Oh, okay.
Guy: I don’t need them seeing ‘Eff you!’
Girl: Haha, I never put that in the subject line.
Guy: Right… Or ‘I eff-ing hate you… And I’m not joking.’
Girl: Hahaha, I haven’t said that in so long!
Guy: You texted that to me last night.
Girl: Oh. Hahaha. No, I said, ‘You better be dead… And I’m not even joking!’
Law office, Highway 10 and 403
Ontario
Canadia
Suit: When Barry* is out, who should get this report?
Boss: Give it to Barry — he’s in.
Suit: When I asked Susan* I thought she said he wasn’t working today.
Boss: She’s absolutely right. But he is here today.
2nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
- Posted on
- Bosses and Underlings, General Idiocy, New Jersey
Salesman: We’re looking for your shorts!
8531 East Marginal Way South
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Lowly Clerk
- Posted on
- Consultants, Time Management, Washington
Lieutenant: I can’t wait to get my hands on your package and give it a good scrubbing.
Oak Harbor, Washington
- Posted on
- Dumb Bosses, Possible Sexual Harassment, Washington
Male coworker: All I hear is, ‘Yap, yap, yap, I’m cold, yap, yap, yap, I’m a woman.
Gainesville, Florida
Overheard by: Erin
Sales manager: Jack* didn’t show up to work today. He probably went to an interview at another company.
VP: Is this the guy with the shoes?
Sales manager: Yep.
VP: Any dude wearing white shoes and a white belt is somewhat suspect…
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Smiths
- Posted on
- Bosses and Underlings, California, Gossip
Disembodied voice: Yeah, I had him for five months — a big ol’ black boy. He had a toilet paper fetish.
Capital of Texas Highway
Austin, Texas
Hockey dad: If this snow keeps up, there won’t be any hot-tubbing with the hockey MILFs tonight.
Bachelor: Hockey MILFs?
Hockey dad: You better believe it.
Highways 24 and 401
Cambridge, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: My kid’s on the wrong hockey team
