Suit: Did you send that acceptance to [Rutter]?
Admin: No. Just the offering.
Suit: I asked you to send the offering and the acceptance.
Admin: I heard you asking me to send the offering, but after that I blanked out.
Suit: Well, let me know when you blank back in.

520 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Greek Goddess

Underling: Can I borrow your scissors?
Boss: Depends if you’re going to committ any crimes.
Underling: Just crimes against filing.

1 Easton Oval
Columbus, Ohio

Co-worker #1: Did you see the thing in the parking lot this morning?
Co-worker #2: No, what is it?
Co-worker #1: A huge dildo.
Co-worker #2: Did it fall out of someone’s car?

1504 53rd Avenue West
Bradenton, Florida

Manager: We need to be ducked-rowed here as there will be a lot of scrutiny given we’ve had the opportunity to reoutlook the schedule twice now and yet the schedule continues to slip.

229 8th Street SW
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia

Attendee #1: Can it be programmed so our office and cell phones ring simultaneously?
Attendee #2: What do you mean by simultaneously?

2901 West Alameda Avenue
Burbank, California

Overheard by: Rachel Marie

Manager: [Tim], are you going over the off-site location?
Intern: Yes, I have to pick up the loaner laptop for [Kelly].
Manager: Can you drop this off to shipping and receiving while you are there? Might as well stone 2 birds.

730 International Parkway
Richardson, Texas

Manager: I knew you were going to say that.
Team Lead: Really? How did you know that?
Manager: I have a third sense when it comes to this place.

730 International Parkway
Richardson, Texas

Manager: The organization just gets bloated. There are all these Vice Presidents, and each of them has 10 or 12 locations reporting to him. And they all need resources, so he puts his team together. Sometimes you just need an enema.

901 East Whitmore Avenue
Modesto, California

Team Leader: Well, you know I always have to be right, don’t you?
Employee: You’re lucky to have stayed married all of these years.
Team Leader: Yes, well my wife is a very patient woman.
Employee: Either that or deaf.

14840 Conference Center Drive
Chantilly, Virginia

Overheard by: Jen Foster

Designer: All right. V & S Courier will pick up those CDs this afternoon.
Writer: “V & S”? What is that, Venereal and Syphillis?
Designer: I think so. And like venereal and syphillis, they are always traveling back and forth. From customer to customer.

16430 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona