These are all from the same coworker.
Overheard on phone: I am going to need you to help me because this is not information that is readily available in my…uh…brain.
In a meeting while it was snowing outside: This reminds me of growing up in New York…I mean…Vermont.
Another meeting: The last thing we want to do is provide an immediate response to an immediate question.
522 SW 5th
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Breanna Freeman
Guy #1: You know what's a bad way to go? Velociraptors.
Guy #2: I'm not afraid of them anymore. I'd say the T-Rex is worse.
Guy #1: Come on–everybody chooses the man-eating tiger.
Guy #2: Or ape.
(pause)
Guy #1: I wouldn't mind working on a farm.
Victoria
BC
Canadia
CSR, on phone with customer: I'm sorry, but that's not a confirmation code. That's the word “denied.”
Bryan, Texas
Overheard by: Jax
Professor: Does anyone have questions about the importance of the flood myth in the Bible and the Epic of Gilgamesh?
Student: Well, when it flooded and everything died, what happened to all the fish?
Professor: Well, it was a flood… So I think they were okay…
Skidmore College
Saratoga Springs, New York
Overheard by: Stared in disbelief
Customer: I think you're making that up.
Employee: I think you're trespassing.
Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia
Casting assistant: …I mean… If you’re not going to type your letter, you might want to make sure that your handwriting doesn’t make you look like a serial killer.
Diamond Street
Brooklyn, New York
Overheard by: Tigertail
Study abroad agent: We currently have 10 students in dozens of countries.
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Case manager #1: We need to go to McDonald's.
Case manager #2: What are we gonna get?
Case manager #1: No, just to scare the kids.
San Antonio, Texas
Designer: I just don’t trust anything that doesn’t come out of a cow!
Newspaper
Melbourne
Australia
Boss, abruptly: Should I give this porn star money?
Los Angeles, California