Worker #1: I thought you were supposed to be at the doctor.
Worker #2: Look at me! I can’t go in there! He’d put me on something for sure!
4182 Forsyth Road
Macon, Georgia
…Could You Turn on My Computer for Me?
Creative director: I can't take the course because I don't have the software.
Peon: Why don't you find out what the software costs and how to get it, and submit a proposal?
Creative director: I don't know where to find that information.
Peon: Why don't you use something called “the internet” to look it up?
Creative director: You mean like go into Google and type the name of the software?
Peon: Yeah, like that.
Creative director: Oh, good idea.
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Horse Whisperer
Sometimes You Feel Like Getting Off, Sometimes You Don't
(elevator door opens)
Female voice coming from elevator: Nuts!
(elevator door closes without anyone getting off)
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: james
The “T” Is Silent but Deadly
Receptionist: Farce? Is that like farts?
352 7th Avenue
New York, New York
How to Make a Roomful Of White People Fall Silent: Encapsulated
Sole African American lady in office: Man! If she sticks her head any farther up the boss' ass, she'll look like me!
Jeannette, Pennsylvania
This Way You'll Never Forget It
CSR: So that is apartment “E,” like “echo”?
Customer: Eh… No, no, no. “E” like “elephant”!
Kitchener
Ontario
Canadia
So Only Old or Stupid People Deal with Him Now
Employee: Where’s Bob* been the last few days?
Manager: Oh… He’s been AOL for a while now.
1080 Greenwood Boulevard
Lake Mary, Florida
Overheard by: Something Mickey this way comes
Another Touching Office Tale.
Scatter-brained boss: Oh! Can I touch it?
Subordinate: Um.
Scatter-brained boss: Would you like to touch mine?
Fairfax, Virginia
“You mean this ‘phone’ device allows me to speak to other places?”
Guy: That person I just talked to was so nice. He sounded so relaxed, and people from New York never sound like that.
Woman: He’s in Miami.
228 East 45th Street
New York, NY
5PM That’s a Wrap
Office worker: You know how everyone just looks at themselves and sees pure ugliness?
1800 G Street NW
Washington, DC