Boss to chubby young female coworker: Hey, why are you jingling?
Chubby young female co-worker (after brief pause): Umm, because I'm fat.
Boss (horrified): Wait… What?! No, no, not “jiggle” …jingle!
Chubby young female coworker (laughing): Oooooooh! (lifts up foot and gives it a shake) I have little bells on my socks!
New Market, Maryland
Erring employee: Shit, I screwed it up.
Naive employee: Don't worry. If it's screwable, I've done it.
Lakewood, Colorado
Director, miming painting a wall: This is painting. It's kind of like bitch-slapping.
Adult Film Company
New York
Overheard by: fetishgirl
Older woman: This is the first day since you started here that I haven't talked to you!
Younger man: I know! I'm going to go home and write about it in my diary!
Anoka, Minnesota
Overheard by: Will he use his sparkly pen?
Employee #1: Is the new copier up and running yet?
Employee #2: It's been plugged in since Wednesday, but we're not using it yet. I think it's charging.
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: On The Wrong Planet
Manager: I'd always give up something I hate for lent…like string beans, or vagina.
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Sarah R
Phone drone, to subscriber on the phone: Every piece of information subscribers tell me I basically file away in my head as a little piece of information.
Technology Drive
Malvern, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: captainobvious
Female clerk to male clerk: Every time I see you, you're either pushing it in or pushing it out.
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: oh realllyyyy
Coworker #1: I can't believe we didn't catch that last time!
Coworker #2: We did… and laughed at it.
Manhattan, New York
[In the ER.]Nurse #1: Oh my god.
Nurse #2: What?
Nurse #1, looking horrified: I just entered all of these notes on the wrong patient’s file.
Nurse #2: It’s okay. Just go back, delete, and re-enter them for the right patient.
Nurse #1, distressed at herself: But that’s awful! What would have happened?
Nurse #2, shrugging: ‘s’okay, happens all the time.
Hospital
Beckley, West Virginia
