Male coworker: The last place I danced was at a strip club!
Female coworker: I didn’t think there was a place to dance at a strip club except that one little stage, and I didn’t think they let boys up there.
Male coworker: Well, somehow I ended up there… They won’t let me in the Dells anymore!
Female coworker: Why not?
Male coworker: I had my face in places it shouldn’t have been.
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: hoping he meant the guacamole
Middle management guy: What's shaking?
Indian tech guy: What is shaking? You want me to stop something from shaking?
Middle management guy: No, I…
Indian tech guy: Are you having a technology crisis? Is your desktop vibrating?
Middle management guy: No! How's it going? How are you, is what I'm asking.
Indian tech guy: Oh, I see. I am fine. Is your desktop alright, though?
Middle management guy: Yes, yes. Everything is working. (sighs)
Washington, DC
Female cube dweller to coworker: Stop that, you don't know me well enough to bite my nipples!
Rockford, Illinois
Employee #1: I love Chex Mix so much I'd grind it up, stick it in an IV and mainline it.
Employee #2: I…well… (pauses in thought) You couldn't *freebase* it…
Mesa, Arizona
Overheard by: Chris Cardinal
Male coworker: I can't find that file he was talking about anywhere.
Female coworker: I swear, if I have to keep listening to your screeching voice anymore, I'm going to start killing babies.
Los Angeles, California
Male supervisor on phone to boss: Okay, I'll do the cash out today, oh and can you bring makeup tomorrow and turn me into an old woman? (pause) Great, thanks!
Olypmic Peninsula, Washington
Overheard by: great scott
Secretary on phone: I guess I don't need a tapeworm after all.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Female Excel nerd: Time to go make more price lists! Excel is my bitch.
Redheaded dominatrix: And you are mine.
42nd Street
New York City, New York
CEO: That would basically put me in the position of a shitting duck.
Calgary
Canadia
