Cubicle #1: Since I have to travel through Virginia next week, I’m going to take Amy*’s suggestion and get a mega millions ticket. The powerball isn’t working out so well for me.
Cubicle #2: My husband laughs at me because I want to keep working if I win the lottery.
Cubicle #3: What!?
Cubicle #2: Yeah, I want to keep working.
Cubicle #3: Well…
Cubicle #1 & #3, in unison: I wouldn’t work here.

England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina

Coworker: My aunt refuses to get on a ferry. So I asked her why, and she said it's because they always sink. And I said, “When do you ever hear about ferries sinking?” and she said, “The ones coming up from Cuba! They sink all the time!”

Navy Yard
Washington, DC

Salesgirl: How was your first trip to New York? Have a good time?
Salesman: Oh my god, it was awesome! All the restaurants we went to were amazing! So expensive, though.
Salesgirl: Yeah, Manhattan's pretty pricey.
Salesman: Yeah. (pause). I think the restaurants are expensive because they have to import all their supplies onto the island.

Studio City, California

Overheard by: goofopet

Air steward, during safety demonstration: We are expecting some turbulence during this flight. Please remain seated with your seat belt buckled. Remember, we have worker's compensation and you don't.

San Diego, California

Overheard by: Kirstoona

Cubicle dweller #1: What better way to die, backpacking across Antarctica?
Cubicle dweller #2: I can see the headline now, “Man dies while being sodomized by a leopard seal.”

Church Street
Nashville, Tennessee

Office girl: My mom said she almost wrecked her car the other day because she was watching Elvis pick up trash on the side of the road. My mom said he was picking up trash in his jumpsuit, right there on the side of the road.
Office guy: Elvis was doing a little community service, was he?

Charlotte, North Carolina

Caller: I am calling about a claim that was denied last week.
Insurance customer service: Which claim is that, ma'am?
Caller: The one from my doctor's visit while we were in Hawaii.
Insurance customer service: Well, ma'am, your policy doesn't cover international medical claims–so your doctor's visit in Hawaii wouldn't be covered.

Denver, Colorado

Coworker #1: Have you filed your travel voucher for that conference in Indianapolis?
Coworker #2: Yes.
Coworker #1: Let me see your copy so I can fill mine out correctly.
Coworker #2: Here you go.
Coworker #1: Let’s see. You used the year ’05 instead of ’06, did not provide departure/arrival times, omitted your social security number, and didn’t total the round trip mileage and mileage reimbursement columns. Thanks.

4555 Central Avenue
Columbus, Indiana

Captain of flight: Good news, folks! We found the airport!

Flight over Newark, New Jersey

Colleague: We went on a day trip to Auschwitz but it’s not a very happy place.

15-19 Bloomsbury Way
London, England