Amtrak conductor #1: There's no quiet car on this train, folks.
Amtrak conductor #2: That's right. This is the party train. We gonna get arrested tonight.
South Station
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: enigmattic
Amtrak conductor #1: There's no quiet car on this train, folks.
Amtrak conductor #2: That's right. This is the party train. We gonna get arrested tonight.
South Station
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: enigmattic
Minister: At least I know where I'm going when I die… Heaven.
Drunk worker: Yeah, I'm going there too.
Minister: You gotta change first.
Drunk worker: I know, I just did…
Jacksonville, Florida
Overheard by: Derrick McClure
Office guy, complaining about his recent camping trip: Bears may do that in the woods, but Alex* does not.
Springdale, Arkansas
Tech: Did you speak a lot of German?
Office girl, just back from England: Um, I don't speak German.
Tech: Oh, so they all speak English over there?
Office girl: No, I just didn't go to Germany.
Fresno, California
Tour guide: And this here is what we call a “grotto,” from the French word for “water.”
Secret Caverns
Cobleskill, New York
Cubicle #1: Since I have to travel through Virginia next week, I’m going to take Amy*’s suggestion and get a mega millions ticket. The powerball isn’t working out so well for me.
Cubicle #2: My husband laughs at me because I want to keep working if I win the lottery.
Cubicle #3: What!?
Cubicle #2: Yeah, I want to keep working.
Cubicle #3: Well…
Cubicle #1 & #3, in unison: I wouldn’t work here.
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Coworker: My aunt refuses to get on a ferry. So I asked her why, and she said it's because they always sink. And I said, “When do you ever hear about ferries sinking?” and she said, “The ones coming up from Cuba! They sink all the time!”
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Salesgirl: How was your first trip to New York? Have a good time?
Salesman: Oh my god, it was awesome! All the restaurants we went to were amazing! So expensive, though.
Salesgirl: Yeah, Manhattan's pretty pricey.
Salesman: Yeah. (pause). I think the restaurants are expensive because they have to import all their supplies onto the island.
Studio City, California
Overheard by: goofopet
Air steward, during safety demonstration: We are expecting some turbulence during this flight. Please remain seated with your seat belt buckled. Remember, we have worker's compensation and you don't.
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Kirstoona
