Bar girl: So you haven't picked up in a year?
Bouncer: Look, it has to be right. I can pick up a girl, ball-gag her and fuck her in the ass, but sometimes I want to cuddle too.
Bar
Melbourne
Austrailia
Bar girl: So you haven't picked up in a year?
Bouncer: Look, it has to be right. I can pick up a girl, ball-gag her and fuck her in the ass, but sometimes I want to cuddle too.
Bar
Melbourne
Austrailia
Cubicle girl to coworker: Sometimes I just spin around in my chair for 15 minutes straight.
Coworker: Sometimes I trim my arm hair with my scissors.
Stockton, California
Boss, explaining how to prepare contract documents: We do this so that we’re not running around, trying to grab our asses in the middle of the night. That’s not what we want to do!
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Matt
Coworker on phone: Yeah, I’ll be over later, but without the ticks.
Johnson City, Tennessee
Coworker on phone: So I told our new accountant what I needed, and he looks at me and says: “But this will take me all day.” I told him: “It takes me all day to do my job too. Did you have other plans?”
3rd Avenue
New York City, New York
Amazed boss: Look at that! He drinks water and types at the same time!
Santa Monica, California
Coworker and mother of a two and a five-year-old : Oh wait! I gotta go. I have to pick my kids up from the jail!
N Willamette Street
Coburg, Oregon
Overheard by: Glad her husband is a sheriff
Boss: For an hour I’m going to do nothing but urinate. And then? Five minutes of blogging.
Los Angeles, California
Student: Hi, I was wondering what time you closed.
Front desk clerk: We close tonight at midnight.
Student: Yeah, but what time exactly? Like 9 pm?
Seattle, Washington
Male payroll processor: If you want me to process your payroll, you have to put the time you came in and left.
Female coworker: I was out sick. Did you see that I used sick time?
Male payroll processor: Yeah! What’s your point?
Female coworker: I was out sick! I didn’t come in or leave!
Male payroll processor: Whatever! More work for me!
Speedway
Tucson, Arizona
