Visiting techie on phone: What's wrong with the clock? Is it plugged in? Well, move the fridge then… I can, but I'm two-and-a-half hours away…
Texas
Visiting techie on phone: What's wrong with the clock? Is it plugged in? Well, move the fridge then… I can, but I'm two-and-a-half hours away…
Texas
Young female worker: Oh! Just the lady I wanted to see!
Mature female worker: Hang on! I have to do something and then I’ll be in my usual cupboard if you want to see me!
Freshwater Place, Southbank
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Nose E Parker
Professional woman: I work out at lunch everyday, it’s part of my routine.
Professional man: Wow, you really have some testical fortitude to stick to that routine.
Woman: What?
One Shell Plaza Elevator
Houston, Texas
Employee: Hi.
Receptionist (without looking up): Hi.
(employee walks behind desk)
Receptionist (still not looking) What are you doing?
Employee: Shredding.
Receptionist (looks up confused): What?
Employee (turns on machine): Wow, your shredder is really slow.
Receptionist: That’s the laminator.
San Jose, California
Overheard by: Walking to the Bathroom
Customer: And what are your hours?
Leasing rep: We’re open from 10 to 6.
Customer: So could I do 6:30?
Leasing rep: No, we close at 6.
Customer: Oh, okay, I guess that’ll work then.
Randallstown, Maryland
Overheard by: tkap
Co-worker #1: Why are you sitting there starring at your monitor while the computer is off?
Co-worker #2: Because I recieved a server message stating that it was going to install something on my computer and that I should save everything before 15 minutes are up because the system will shut down.
Co-worker #1: Did you save everything?
Co-worker #2: Yes.
Co-worker #1: Did the computer shut down by itself?
Co-worker #2: Yes.
Co-worker #1: So, why are you sitting there starring at the monitor while the computer is off?
Co-worker #2: I’m waiting for the computer to start back up.
Co-worker #1: Have you pressed the power button?
Co-worker #2: No.
1000 Jerry St. Pe’ Highway
Pascagoula, Mississippi
Coworker #1: So I have decided that I'm only going to do work when the boss is in the office.
Coworker #2: Haha! That is so awesome!
Coworker #1: I feel like it's only fair, if she isn't going to be here working, why should I work?
Coworker #2: I agree, she is the captain of this ship, after all.
Coworker #1: And, if I'm forced to do work, for example take a telephone call, I will document the time so that in the future I can make up that time back by not working.
Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Production Tech: Oh that’s right, I forgot, someone else is going to have to pick up Dillon* on Friday. I’m gonna go get married.
859 Cotting Court
Vacaville, California
Manager: Can you gather up the other guys? We have to move a bunch of stuff.
Employee: Fuck you.
Manager: What did you just say to me?
Employee: Fuck you, asshole.
Manager: Are you nuts?
Employee: Fuck you, bitch.
Manager: You’re fired. Get out of here.
Employee: I wasn’t clocked in. You can’t fire me.
Manager walks to computer, clocks him in, says, ‘You’re fired,’ and then clocks him out.
Employee: That’s so unfair.
Circle Centre Mall
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Guy #1: How was your weekend?
Guy #2: Good. I ran some errands. I got my car waxed and sodomized.
33 Maiden Lane
New York, NY
