Teachers

Instructor in hallway: Jacob! Where are your clothes, naked boy? Naked boy!

Martial Arts Academy
Virginia Beach, Virginia

Professor in nearby cubicle: They were human beings; you had to harass them a little.
Student: Yeah.

West Lafayette, Indiana

Overheard by: Rachel S

Lecturer, discussing cell membranes: So now the membrane has potential… unlike my career.

Physiology Lecture
Melbourne University
Australia

Overheard by: martinasnape

Female teacher: So how did the date go?
Male teacher: It went really well up until the part where I mentioned she resembled Kelsey Grammer.

El Paso, Texas

Overheard by: Lena

Little old Indian professor, struggling to set up lecture on Excel: I am feeling retarded. This is why I don't use those iPods and stuff…I am afraid.

Tufts University
Medford/Somerville, Massachusetts

Overheard by: microsoft excel is pretty evil

Office brute, 15 minutes late to sexual harassment seminar, to female instructor: Sorry, darlin', I hope I didn't miss anything.

Austin, Texas

Advisor: You know, her lack of concern for this is really biting me in the ass now. I should have been more aware.
Female grad student: Well, we all should have paid more attention to her work.
Advisor: You know, that's a good point, because trust me: your ass is not protected from biting!

Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

Grad student: So I think that the manuscript should be organized differently…
(advisor's phone rings, he has a quick conversation in Arabic)
Advisor: Goddammit, sorry. I hate when my damn Arab relatives call, they always want me to set them up with prostitutes for their trips to the United States.
Grad student: Uh…
Advisor: Anyway, where is figure 3 going in your paper now?

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

Grad student: How was the meeting?
Neurology professor: It was great, and this time I took really good notes, see? Right here I wrote, “Why is the neurons are gone?”

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: LabCat

Culinary professor: There were times that I wanted to be spanked.

Niagara Falls, New York

Overheard by: wishing she heard the beginning