Butch chick: I read The Lion and the Mouse when I was young! It's a story about how the lion got a thorn in his paw and the mouse helped him remove it, and they became friends.
Normal chick: What a stupid lion, why didn't he just eat the mouse?
Butch chick: It's a story of morality for children! Help someone, be friendly!
Normal chick: So?
Butch chick: You don't eat your friends!
Borders
Melbourne Central
Australia
Overheard by: Incognito
Sheepish cube dweller trying to be quiet: Yeah. This is Angie* from last night. I think I left my gym shoes in your car last night when we were done.
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: Septimus
Manager, training new employee: If they call and are interested in strap-on play and ask for, say, mistress Lola, tell them she's been roaming the halls with her strap-on, humping the walls.
New employee, with wide eyes: Really?
Established employee, passing by: Only on Sundays.
Grand & Ogden
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Yes, It's a BDSM Dungeon
Office man trying to help lady with machinery: Wait, you need to put it in the hole!
Frustrated lady: What do you mean? I never have had to look for any hole!
Office man: Well, I know that's true.
Austin, Texas
Male colleague to another, discussing fantasy football: You cannot make me happy unless you release all of your Johnsons.
Wilmington, Massachusetts
Coworker, about new Twitter follower: Never mind, I thought it was a hooker.
Amarillo, Texas
Overheard by: Gina
Cubicle mate on phone: Yeah, that’s so me. Wait, now what is this called? Well I’d rather be a dog walker than a porn star!
Topeka, Kansas
Coworker #1, dropping summer sausage for lunch: Hey, you want some of my sausage?
Coworker #2: Only if you wash it off first.
Bourbonnais, Illinois
Overheard by: the closet is my office
Admin: It says here, “his marriage stopped due to alcohol and wanking too much.”
Pause
Admin: Hold on…… maybe it says “working to much.”
101 Whitechapel Road
London, UK
Overheard by: nurse
Photographer #1: It doesn't need to be sucked that hard.
Photographer #2: Yes, it does.
Photographer #3: I am more about friction then suction.
Studio
Culver City, California
