Presenter: We're going to go over our organization's strengths and weaknesses now. So, do you want to talk about how much we suck or how much we rock first?
Audience member: That's what she said.
STAND Conference, Harvard
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Presenter: We're going to go over our organization's strengths and weaknesses now. So, do you want to talk about how much we suck or how much we rock first?
Audience member: That's what she said.
STAND Conference, Harvard
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Male intern #1: Was she hot?
Male intern #2: She had a huge rack.
Female intern: (laughs)
Male intern #1: What? Are boobs funny now?
Female intern: No, he just didn't really answer the question.
Male intern #2: Yeah, I did. He basically said “would you do her?” and I said “yeah.”
Female intern: No, I mean, if you just saw her face, would you say she was pretty?
Male intern #2: If I saw just her face?
Female intern: Yeah.
Male intern #2: I wouldn't recognize her.
Des Moines, Iowa
Young attorney #1: I look like an old woman in this coat.
Young attorney #2: Maybe a slutty old woman.
Young attorney #1: I wish I was a slutty old woman.
Norristown, Pennsylvania
Friend of coworker: (mumbling)
Coworker: So now I am sensitive to size!
Friend of coworker: (more mumbling).
University of Idaho
Moscow, Idaho
Employee #1: So you’re saying the rumors about the possible merger aren’t true?
Board Member: Yes. It’s like we’re dating. We’re going out but we haven’t kissed yet.
Employee #2: You may not have kissed yet, but it sure seems like you’re sleeping together.
1500 Wallace Boulevard
Amarillo, Texas
Typist lady, answering the phone: Hello! How are you this morning? (pause) I'm wet.
Yaphank, New York
Overheard by: Junior
Tech illiterate office guy: Phil, how do you lubricate the internet?
Sydney
Australia
Waitress: I don’t want any sauce touching me… Unless it’s being licked off of me.
1027 West Horsetooth Road
Fort Collins, Colorado
Woman on phone with client: Let me put this to you another way: you pay for four hours with a whore. You buy her a catsuit. At the end of that time, you don't own the whore. You may still retain the catsuit but what good will that do you, since you're a 45-year-old balding fat guy? You might as well leave the catsuit with the whore.
Defense Contractor
Andover, Massachusetts
Designer to sales rep, about ad consultation: Do you want to do it with me right now?
Sales rep: You can do me right now? I'll just go downstairs and get my stuff.
Designer: The room is free, so we'll have no problem getting it in.
Scarborough
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: m00nwater
