Suit #1: Oh, fucking great. This is how– [Jon] is getting married. And I have to sign this stupid card along with everyone else like–
Suit #2: Wow, hostile much? We barely know him.
Suit #1: Oh, I know his fiancee quite…ugh, never mind.
71 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Intern hears all
Partner #1: So, I explained to her that I didn’t feel that commercial sexual relationships constituted adultery. And she bought it.
Partner #2: Gotta love the commerce clause.
575 Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Male phone representative to female customer: Mmm… Okay… Yeah… Am I married?
Call Center
Beaverton, Oregon
Receptionist: God, I love today.
Supervisor: You know, I hate it when you get laid.
Receptionist, blushing: Yeah, I know…
General manager: You're just saying that because your wife won't put out.
Supervisor: That's not really funny.
General manager: Yeah, it is… If we were lucky, Tammy here would hire out, then everyone could get laid.
Roswell, New Mexico
Overheard by: Yikes!
New supervisor, straight from the military: It’s my job to protect you from the people above me.
26-year veteran of the agency: I’ve got Jesus and a man. I don’t need any more protection than that.
Federal Office Building
Washington DC
Overheard by: Wasting my best years
Female employee: What the hell is she fussing at? He’s only two years older than her. If he’s old, she’s old!
Office manager: She’s just trying to ruffle your feathers.
Sales guy: You should tell her your husband can beat up her husband.
Assistant: Which one? She’s got a couple.
Female employee: Hey!
Sales guy: Haha, I forgot she’s got like three husbands now.
Female employee: I hate you guys.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Girl #1: You know that gay guy that works second shift?
Girl #2: Yeah, what about him?
Girl #1: I took him out to meet all my hetero friends, and they enjoyed the shit out of him.
2800 East 28th Street
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: snorted my diet mountain dew
Male coworker to another: I woke up this morning and you weren't there.
7th St
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Phone Slave
Marketing coworker: My wife is an identical twin.
AP coworker: Did you ever ask them for a threesome?
Marketing coworker: Hell no! My wife's twin is a pain in the ass!
Greenwood Village, Colorado
Sales manager: Being an alcoholic is much cheaper than being married.
Tanbark Drive
Greentown, Pennsylvania
