X-ray tech: I just finished with Seaman. You know, his friends call him “cum.”
Lakeville, Massachusetts
X-ray tech: I just finished with Seaman. You know, his friends call him “cum.”
Lakeville, Massachusetts
Supervisor: I wonder if we could get her to move back here. What's keeping her in Austin?
Worker: She has a boyfriend.
Supervisor: Come on! You can get dick anywhere!
Dallas, Texas
Coworker #1: I think it's creepy you kiss your dad on the lips. It's like making out with your father.
Coworker #2: Why do you think that's creepy?! I'm his daughter! His sperm is inside of me!
St. Louis, Missouri
Butch chick: I read The Lion and the Mouse when I was young! It's a story about how the lion got a thorn in his paw and the mouse helped him remove it, and they became friends.
Normal chick: What a stupid lion, why didn't he just eat the mouse?
Butch chick: It's a story of morality for children! Help someone, be friendly!
Normal chick: So?
Butch chick: You don't eat your friends!
Borders
Melbourne Central
Australia
Overheard by: Incognito
Bimbo: She really didn’t betray him other than sleeping with someone else.
1300 Riverside Avenue
Fort Collins, Colorado
Overheard by: dazed and confused
Suit hanging up phone: I am so done with married chicks — they have too much baggage.
3250 42nd Street
New York, New York
Female coworker #1, quietly: So have you had any success yet?
Female coworker #2, quietly: No, she won't let me anywhere near her feet.
Female coworker #1: Okay. I'll tell you what you've got to do. (whispers furtively)
Chili, New York
Overheard by: NewGirl
Admin: It says here, “his marriage stopped due to alcohol and wanking too much.”
Pause
Admin: Hold on…… maybe it says “working to much.”
101 Whitechapel Road
London, UK
Overheard by: nurse
Woman arguing on phone with husband: Calm down, please. I'm sending you a picture of a funny cat. Go look at the cat.
Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia
Lady peon: I really want to fuck him, but I can’t. I’m trying to be monogamous in my non-relationship relationship.
Club restroom
Anchorage, Alaska