Guy on speakerphone: How was your weekend?
VP: Good. How was yours?
Guy on speakerphone: Oh, you know — same old, same old… Just spent it trying to avoid my wife.
5690 DTC Boulevard
Greenwood Village, Colorado
Guy on speakerphone: How was your weekend?
VP: Good. How was yours?
Guy on speakerphone: Oh, you know — same old, same old… Just spent it trying to avoid my wife.
5690 DTC Boulevard
Greenwood Village, Colorado
Coworker #1: So you saw her at church then, that is kinda cool.
Coworker #2: Yeah, because at least I know she isn't out getting gang-banged on a Sunday, which is nice.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Professor Awesome
Boss to intern: The gym is a great place for networking. You tend to have a bit more pull with your colleagues when you see them naked in the locker room every morning.
Bellingham, Washington
Office lady on cell: Yeah, I was supposed to have lunch with my husband, but he was busy with his girlfriends. (pause) Yeah, at least he tells me when he dates. (pause) Me? No, I just fuck whoever I want, and he can kiss my ass. (pause) Yeah, I am free Thursday.
Chicago, Illinois
Cube rat to another: I just wouldn't be able to sleep with myself if I did something like that to someone.
Oceanside, California
Female peon #1: It’s so hard to go out, never mind find a new guy. My ex and I both grew up in Randolph, so we know everyone. I can’t go anywhere without him or his friends being there.
Female peon #2: You should come to The Jug with me. I know plenty of guys your age.
Boss: You want to meet guys in a bar? You should get a nice guy from church.
Female peon #2: Are you suggesting that we work the church?
Avon, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Fae
X-ray tech: I just finished with Seaman. You know, his friends call him “cum.”
Lakeville, Massachusetts
Supervisor: I wonder if we could get her to move back here. What's keeping her in Austin?
Worker: She has a boyfriend.
Supervisor: Come on! You can get dick anywhere!
Dallas, Texas
Coworker #1: I think it's creepy you kiss your dad on the lips. It's like making out with your father.
Coworker #2: Why do you think that's creepy?! I'm his daughter! His sperm is inside of me!
St. Louis, Missouri
Butch chick: I read The Lion and the Mouse when I was young! It's a story about how the lion got a thorn in his paw and the mouse helped him remove it, and they became friends.
Normal chick: What a stupid lion, why didn't he just eat the mouse?
Butch chick: It's a story of morality for children! Help someone, be friendly!
Normal chick: So?
Butch chick: You don't eat your friends!
Borders
Melbourne Central
Australia
Overheard by: Incognito
