Receptionists

Accountant: We’re taking Mark* to Joe’s Crab Shack for his retirement party at the end of the month.
Secretary: Is that where you want to go? I figured you for more of a Hooters man. Wouldn’t you rather have Hooters than crabs?
Mark: I thought the two went hand in hand! You can’t have one without the other.

401 Church Street
Nashville Tennessee

Coworker to receptionist: Yeah, that's her in the picture. I recognize the triple chin. I bet she's a secret dominatrix or something.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: crosberg

Receptionist #1: I don't like stairs.
Receptionist #2: Yeah, they're creepy.

Fort Worth, Texas

Overheard by: bob

20-something receptionist, commenting on cutesy photo of boy and dog praying: You know, I don’t really like kids, animals or god, but that photo’s okay.

Mill Valley, California

HR clerk: He got so excited and he crapped all over himself.
Receptionist, laughing: Did Jim [manager] do that again?
Hr clerk: Uh, no, I was talking about my new puppy.
Receptionist: Oh, forget what I just said. Please forget! I was supposed to forget.

Pearl, Mississippi

Overheard by: Brain Dancing

Receptionist: No, sir. No, I don't know where you heard that. (pause) No, our judges cannot issue you a new Green Card over the phone.

Baltimore, Maryland

Secretary: I didn’t know I could write off a hummer on my taxes!

383 Madison Street
New York, NY

Boss, with customer on phone, to secretary: Mr Smith* says he doesn't understand this bill you sent him.
Secretary, quietly, from across the room: It isn't complicated, can't he read?
Boss, loudly, next to phone: Yes, he can read!

Winchester, Virginia

Receptionist: He’s not in, may I take a message?…No, we don’t have voice mail, but I’ll be happy to take a message…I write it on a piece of paper and had it to him when he comes in.

1718 Villa Avenue
Indianapolis, Indiana

CSR: You know sometimes when you blow, you can feel it in your throat?
Secretary: No, I don’t blow that hard.
CSR: Well, I blow hard and I can feel it sometimes. It sucks.

541 Lexington Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Eve S Dropper