Questions

Worker #1: Did you hear me? I just said I hit my knee on the window.
Worker #2: But there are no windows in your cubicle.
Worker #1: I know, I meant chair.
Worker #2: Hey [worker #3], did you hear [worker #1]? She said window but meant chair.
Worker #1: I also meant arm not knee.
Worker #2: Wait, so when you said, “I hit my knee on the window,” you really meant,”I hit my arm on the chair?”
Worker #1: Yeah.
Worker #2: You’re beautiful.

Rt 31, Illinois

Girl: Did you ever eat SpaghettiO's when you were a kid?
Guy: No, my parents loved me.

Grocery Store
Vancouver, Washington

Phone Rep: Sir, are you self-employed?…OK. And do you own the prison?

14700 Citicorp Drive
Hagerstown, Maryland

Coworker #1: My palms are sweaty. What do you think that means?
Coworker #2: It means you’re annoyed.
Coworker #1: Really?
Coworker #2: No, I guess I was just projecting.

330 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Claims adjuster: Can we go to your office? I need to discuss something. And I'll bring the kegs. Where are the kegs? They were just here.

McKinley Square
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Receptionist

Weird guy: Hey, has anyone ever been tased?

Government Office
Washington, DC

PR Girl on cell: Hello, Fast Signs? How fast are your signs?

41 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Cube rat #1: Hey, is that light bothering you? It's driving me crazy.
Cube rat #2: No, it's not.
Cube rat #1: Really? I can't stand it.
Cube rat #2: Yeah, I know, that's why I like it.

Cincinnati, Ohio

Co-worker: Do you want to tell them the truth?
Boss: What’s the truth?
Co-worker: The truth is that you can’t go and I don’t feel like it.
Boss: So you want to tell them that?
Co-worker: Yeah.
Boss: Do you want to tell them the truth or the enchanced version of the truth?

100 Chesley Drive
Media, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Back Office Peon

Social worker on the phone: No sir, the hospital does not offer financial assistance for penile prosthesis. Well, have you spoken with Dr. Wang in the erectile dysfunction clinic?

Holcombe & Bertner
Houston, Texas

Overheard by: Just the Secretary