Historian: Why are we in academia?
Bio-chemist: Because we weren't good enough to join the circus.
Oxford
England
Historian: Why are we in academia?
Bio-chemist: Because we weren't good enough to join the circus.
Oxford
England
Trainee: So, seriously, can we talk about poop some more?
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Angela
Worker #1: I feel horrible.
Worker #2: What's up?
Worker #1: I took that situation to the boss…
Worker #2: And?
Worker #1: You know you screwed up when Satan looks you in the eye and says, “what the hell were you thinking?”
Oklahoma
Lady holding baby: Do you have a high chair?
Starbucks barista: The chairs over by the window are pretty high.
Starbucks
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I work here
Anthropology teacher: Yes, and when you see human remains… Actually, I have some bones in my car…
(class in stunned silence)
Student #1: Really?
Anthropology teacher: Oh, I always have bones in my car… I think I have some baby bones, too.
Student #1: I hope you never get pulled over.
Student #2: They'll think you're a serial killer!
Anthropology teacher: Well, I love dead bodies! I'll exhume you, I'll exhume him, I'll exhume your grandmother! I'll exhume anyone! (pause) Let me go get them.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: He really is adorable, not creepy.
Office guy #1: It's a little cold, both inside and outside.
Office girl: But not in our hearts!
Office guy #2, points at girl's coffee mug: What are you drinking?
Office girl: Brandy.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: University Lackey
Fisherman to another: So what was the transition like from fishing to prison?
Seattle, Washington
CSR #1, listening to “Pretty Woman”: I love this Elvis song.
CSR #2: This isn't an Elvis song!
CSR #1: Yes, it is.
CSR #2: Did you fall on your head?
CSR #1: I tore my mother's placenta.
Scarborough
Canadia
Overheard by: Cnote
Model, pulling something out of sleeve: Oh, that's where that went. (pops it in her mouth).
Director: Did you just eat sleeve cheese?
Adult Film Company
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: fetishgirl
Young attorney shouting to secretary: Anna*, is it Wednesday?
Secretary: Yes, Jim*.
Young attorney: Still?
Secretary: Yes, Jim, still.
Young attorney: Can you work on that?
Secretary: Sure, Jim.
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: wishing it was friday
