Boss: So I'll need two chickens, a goat… and see if I can get a rooster.
Student worker: Two chickens?
Boss: Yeah. (sees another worker looking at her) I already have people to buy my eggs!
Worker: What is going on in here?!
Mt Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
Editor: Is there any way this can technically be swept under a virtual rug?
Two Penn Plaza
New York, New York
Young phone monkey: Do Canadians celebrate Christmas?
Older phone monkey: Jesus Christ!
Gran Park
Orlando, Florida
Law office secretary: …and who the hell is this MOTO person anyway?
2345 Grand Boulevard
Kansas City, Missouri
Lawyer: So, he was all like, “But I’m a cabinet maker.” And I was like, “But what if you were a brain surgeon…”
111 Congress Avenue
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Neither a cabinet maker nor a brain surgeon
Male boss: Are those cupcakes handmade?
Female subordinate: We don't do hand jobs here!
Washington, DC
Overheard by: This isn't Starbucks
Accountant using secretary's copier: Yeah, I guess you can slide in there and make a copy.
Partner, overhearing: Slide? The electric slide?
(secretary groans)
Partner: What, is that like the worst dance ever?
Secretary: Yeah. 'cuz at least the chicken dance is, like, fun.
Partner: That, and it makes sense, because y'know, that's how chickens dance! (demonstrates by flapping)
Manhattan, New York
Office manager to locksmith: You're the guys who service my back door, right?
Portland, Oregon
Coworker: Why did you move to Atlanta?
Customer: Just looking for greener pastures.
Coworker: Oh, are you in livestock?
Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: plz shoot me now
