Partner #1: Are you coming to the Fourth of July party?
Partner #2: When is it?
16th Street and M Street, NW
Washington, DC
Partner #1: Are you coming to the Fourth of July party?
Partner #2: When is it?
16th Street and M Street, NW
Washington, DC
Assistant: Did anyone order anything from Nuclear?
Sales guy: From who?
Assistant: Nuclear. N-U-C-O-R.
Sales girl: Nucor?
Assistant: Um, yeah. Ha ha ha. Sorry.
Sales guy: Yeah, you’re missing a few letters there.
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Supervisor: Can you print me out a label that says “If it’s Tuesday, oil me”?
545 North 15th Street
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Overheard by: KJean
Agent: Thank you for calling the help desk. Can I have your first and last name, please?
Customer: Is Eudora down?
Agent: Um, Eudora is a program that is isolated on your computer. It is not a system or network of everyone’s email.
Customer: Is Eudora [campus email] down?
Agent: No.
Customer: I’ll call my cable company.
Customer hangs up.
University of Wisconsin
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Brandon
Co-worker #1: What are you up to tonight?
Co-worker #2: After the week I’ve had, I’m getting so drunk I pee on something.
Co-worker #1: Cool.
College Station Drive
Macon, Georgia
PM: Hey, Craig*, can you [makes weird slurping noise]?
Craig: No thanks, I’m married.
PM: I don’t know what that means.
191 Oak Plaza Drive
Winston-Salem, North Carolina
Patient: So how is your blood pressure?
Dentist: Oh, it’s just fine. Thanks.
Dentist winces.
Dentist: Except when people bite my finger. When people bite my finger, it shoots way, way up.
105 Terrebonne Road
Grafton, Virginia
Coworker #1: Hey, can you cover my shift next week?
Coworker #2: Why? Where are you going?
Coworker #1: My friend’s boyfriend is graduating from pharmacology school.
Coworker #2: Ew. Who would want to be a farmer?
3900 Hillsboro Road
Nashville, Tennessee
Guy: Should I put it in the folder?
Girl: Wait, I’m not sure. Should I take it out of the folder?
Guy: Um, maybe I should just put it in the folder.
Girl: No, I should take it out of the folder…
Guy: But, what if we need it in the folder?
127 Marina Drive
La Crosse, Wisconsin
Coworker #1: If she had been paying attention, she would have caught that.
Coworker #2: Does she know to look for it?
Coworker #1: No, she doesn’t know enough to look for it. I’m not ready to show her that, yet.
150 Batson Drive
Manchester, Connecticut
